As Jed Leland might say, “Oh, brother!”

The idea of 3,000 tweeners and their parents charging an Abercrombie Kids store to get a glimpse of a fifteen-year-old pop star would seem to be either an image from a long-ago past or the stuff of pop-culture satire, except it just happened in Long Island. One seriously hurt, the police called in, the whole event cancelled, and hours afterwards girls will still hanging out in the mall waiting for their object of affection to show up. I haven’t followed Justin Bieber’s YouTube career, just listened to his singles as they came out, but obviously his fan base is more obesessed than the blandness of the records themselves would lead you to believe. Somebody needs to remind me of the last time teenage girls nearly rioted over a pop star. I tell you, it’s beginning to feel more like the mid-fifties every day, and we all know where that led.

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