The Illiterate

My intention from now on is to provide short reviews of every record to hit the Hot 100. Most of these will only be a sentence or two. Some, as you can see, will be longer. It all depends on whether I can think of much to say about records I’ve only heard two or three times. Luckily, this week is a pretty good crop. I only count three clunkers among a whole batch of good to near great records, including a couple of potential top tens. Makes it easy to start this whole process off. Here’s hoping next week doesn’t kill it.

Katy Perry–”Waking Up In Vegas”
#65
Nowhere near as titillating as “I Kissed a Girl”, or as catchy as “Hot ‘n’ Cold”, but nowhere near as awful as “Thinking of You”, either. This is a little clunky, and reaches for effects Perry doesn’t know how to pull off yet, but it isn’t horrible, and it offers the same idiosyncratic lyrical quirks that made even “Thinking of You” an interesting listen. I know a lot of people were hoping that Perry would be a one shot, and I thought the same myself at first, but now I think she’s in it for the long haul. I wouldn’t base that judgment on this record alone, but remember she also co-wrote Kelly Clarkson’s “I Do Not Hook Up”, the best song to hit the Hot 100 so far this year.

Fall Out Boy–”America’s Suitehearts”
#78
Yes, Patrick Stump can sing, and, yes, occasionally Pete Wentz gets off a good lyric, but that’s it. The rest is self-important bombast and overkill. Come to think of it, so are Stump’s singing and Wentz’s lyrics most of the time.

Gorilla Zoe–”Echo”
#82
Strange to say, what this most reminds me of, aside from Timbaland’s “Apologize” of course, is the British high-gloss pop-band Prefab Sprout. Those airy synths, the half-spoken, half-sung lyrics, the slight burr in the voice. Paddy McAloon would have made that chorus soar, though, instead of the little sing-songy thing we get here. Still, a good record, and one that demonstrates that Zoe has far more range than I would have guessed from his previous singles.

Maxwell–”Pretty Wings”
#89
More Al Green than even the latest Al Green, this is so subtly crafted and so unassuming even in its massive artistic intentions that what you think of it may depend on how much you’ve missed Maxwell rather than the song itself. It may also depend on how much you’ve missed classic soul horn charts. I say welcome back to both.

Billy Currington–”People Are Crazy”
#90
I like the title hook, but this take on the legend of Howard Hughes and Melvin Dummar is too lacking in relevant detail to get over (though leaving a six-pack on the grave is a nice touch). I suggest renting a copy of Melvin and Howard instead.

Hurricane Chris–”Halle Berry (She’s Fine)”
#91
The only real joke here is how often Chris repeats Berry’s name. The rest is crude celeb fantasies that reduce Berry to just another stripper, which makes me think the only thing they’ve seen Berry in is The Last Boy Scout. But it’s still pretty funny.

Chrisette Michele–”Epiphany”
#92
This is subtle enough to slide right past you at first, but give it a few tries and it grows on you quick. Ne-Yo provides the hook (a great one) and, I’m willing to bet, a lot of advice on how it should be sung. Michele sounds cool and in control, and never oversings or pushes the emotions. Nowhere near as adventurous as Ne-Yo’s own records, but then, the songs Smokey Robinson wrote for others were never as adventurous as the one’s he recorded himself. Ne-Yo isn’t in Smokey territory yet, but he’s getting closer all the time. I have a feeling he’s just hitting his groove.

Toby Keith–”Lost You Anyway”
#97
It wouldn’t make any difference how good I was to her, Toby laments, she’d have left me anyway. That’s ’cause she knows you’re lying, Toby, it’s ’cause she knows you’re lying.

Charlie Wilson–”There Goes My Baby”
#98
I had no idea the prettiest girls hung out at Macy’s, but Charlie Wilson says so, and he was in The Gap Band, and they knew where all the pretty girls were, so it must be true. Oh, and ladies, if you need your hair done, he has a cousin. I’m not sure if this is intended as parody, but Wilson sure sounds like he’s having fun.