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New this week—3/14/10

Wednesday, March 17th, 2010

Justin Bieber—”Never Let You Go”
#21
The most irritating thing about Justin Bieber may be something over which he has no real control: all his records sound the same. He may have talent, but he either possesses such a narrow emotional range that his handlers don’t dare let him express himself, or they have such a narrow idea of what a pop record should be that they can’t take advantage of whatever talent Bieber does possess. The first is a possibility, but I lean toward the second explanation: this is such an obvious retread of Chris Brown’s “Forever” that you wonder if anyone in Bieber’s camp has a single original idea.

Jason DeRulo—”Ridin’ Solo”
#33
Did anybody involved in this record notice how irritating DeRulo’s voice is on the chorus? Did they think it would serve as a kind of hook? Or make up for the fact that nothing else about this record is even vaguely interesting? If so, they were wrong.

Usher featuring Nicki Minaj—”Lil Freak”
#43
Somehow I don’t think Stevie Wonder ever imagined anyone using part of “Livin’ for the City” as background music for an orgy, but I guess we should give Usher a break—he’s got to get over the grief of his divorce somehow.

Avril Lavigne—”Alice”
#71
I long ago resigned myself to the use of Alice in Wonderland as a Rorschach blot for anyone low on ideas who needs a little creative boost, but that only excuses Tim Burton. This is straight cash-in and a terrible record by any standard. The only notable thing about it is that it definitively marks the moment when Lavigne gave up on doing anything new and decided to copy those who have followed in her wake—in this case, Paramore. Even another soppy ballad would be better than this.

Kenny Chesney—”Ain’t Back Yet”
#73
If you define country as music based on the nostalgia of people in their thirties to mid-forties for the pop music of their early teen years, then this is a country record. But even by those standards it isn’t a good country record, just a loud one (with horns, to boot). Gossip hounds, however, will eat up the apparent reference to Renee Zellweger in the last verse.

Godsmack—”Cryin’ Like A Bitch!!”
#74
The exclamation points in the title tell you everything you need to know about this record. Think of them as sudden bursts of guitar and you can pretend you’ve already heard the song without the painful experience of actually listening to it.

Three 6 Mafia Vs Tiesto with Sean Kingston and Flo Rida—”Feel It”
#78
If the artist lineup didn’t tip you off to how desperate these guys are for another hit, the music sure would. Most egregious moment: when Flo Rida comes on, the beat switches to an approximation of “Low”. Even worse, that’s the only part of the record that makes any sense. The rest is a confused mess.

Danny Gokey—”My Best Days Are Ahead of Me”
#78
I never saw Gokey on American Idol, but it’s easy to understand why he was voted off—the only thing thinner than his voice is his material.

La Roux—”Bulletproof”
#92
With all the Eurodisco influence on the charts it’s nice to see the real thing making some headway. Already a number one in the UK, though I doubt it will make it as far here—it’s not brash and straightforward enough for American tastes. I find it a trifle thin and stiff myself, but it’s still better than about 85% of anything else on the charts.

Chris Young—”The Man I Want to Be”
#98
As shameless as self-pitying country gets, this is essentially the male version of Carrie Underwood’s “Jesus Take the Wheel”, only worse, because you can’t help suspecting that all Young really wants is his woman back. What he should really be praying for is better material.

Steel Magnolia—”Keep On Lovin’ You”
#99
Because Lady Antebellum just isn’t enough Sugarland for the country/pop market.

Eric Church—”Hell On the Heart”
#100
Church is the kind of guy who believes old-fashioned things like simple, catchy melodies, short songs (this one clocks in at 2:45, shorter than both his previous singles, only one of which is over three minutes), and strict stereo separation. He also gets better with each record. But he isn’t that good yet. Cliches keep popping up in his lyrics, and thematically there’s nothing that separates him from a few thousand other good ol’ boys. He also has a tendency to sprinkle his interviews with references to how much better he is than everybody else. I like this record, and I hope he gets better, but I’m not holding my breath.

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New this week—3/7/10

Thursday, March 11th, 2010

Ludacris featuring Nicki Minaj—”My Chick Bad”
#46
Notable mainly for containing the first Tiger Woods joke to make the Hot 100. When Ludacris is doing his rapid fire spitting over something loud and boisterous, his tastelessness goes down fairly easy. When he slows himself down like this, his crudity—not just in his humor, but in his flow—shines through.

Taio Cruz featuring Ludacris—”Break Your Heart”
#53
Already a number one in the UK (and now in the US), and it’s easy to see why. The rough formula appears to be a mix of Akon and Chris Brown over a euro-techno beat, with the lilting tenor vocals that are so popular right now (i.e. B.O.B, Jay-Z-s “Forever Young”, anything by Drake). Ludacris adds nothing, but he doesn’t detract either. In commercial pop terms, it’s a classic. It’s sheer fluff (the music has nothing whatever to do with the lyrical message of the song), but it goes down easy, catchy enough to get your attention, short enough that you’ll want to hear it again once it does, and after a third listen it will be playing in your head forever. And when it does finally fade away, there’ll be something just like it to replace it with.

Kris Allen—”Let It Be”
#63
I suppose I could give Allen points for trying to make something new out of this warhorse, but removing the melody is not the way to go about it. I know everyone’s tired of hearing it, but there is something majestic, yet humble, about that tune, and without it the lyrics are close to meaningless. Not that anyone notices what “Let It Be” is about anymore, anyway. Why else would they use a song about peaceful resignation as a call to action?

Trey Songz—”Neighbors Know My Name”
#88
I tend to think of this as a follow-up to J. Holliday’s “Bed” or Jeremih’s “Birthday Sex”, but it’s more polished, and its humor is more intentional (I think) than those two. It’s also funnier—and sexier. If you never thought the day would come that you’d laugh at a soul singer crooning the word “headboard”, you were wrong.

Matisyahu—”One Day”
#90
Well-meaning pap, and limp well-meaning pap, at that. Produced by the same team who created B.O.B.’s “Nothin’ On You”, who turn on the bland this time around, and co-written by Akon, who’s trying to collect as many well-meaning karma points as he can before his next album comes out. But the real weakness is the singer, who has all the technical gifts and none of the force or spirit of the Jamaican dancehall singers he imitates so assiduously (Barrington Levy would eat this guy for breakfast). Though I hesitate to suggest it, this comes perilously close, in my mind, to minstrelsy.

Yo Gotti featuring Lil Wayne—”Women Lie, Men Lie”
#93
Another attempt to recreate that “A Milli” magic with an endlessly repeating, weird-sounding vocal hook. Almost works, too. But this is the only record I can think of where Lil Wayne simply disappears from memory once the track is over. The best joke is when Gotti starts exaggerating his list of possessions—he doesn’t sound that different from most other rappers. Of course, I always assume they’re lying, anyway; it’s hardly necessary to drive the point home.

Joe Nichols—”Gimmie That Girl”
#98
This is catchy enough and fiery enough near the end that it could almost be mistaken for some alt-country track from the early 80s. Once you hear that Moore likes his woman barefoot and in the kitchen, though, you’ll know you’re still in good-ol’ traditional Nashville (where the early 80s is about as far into alt-country as anyone cares to go). Thank the Lord for small favors: at least she’s not pregnant (yet).

Justin Moore—”Backwoods”
#100
Having covered the small town USA cliches on, er, “Small Town USA”, Moore heads out to the backwoods for another hootin’ hollerin’ mess o’ stuff you’ve already heard too many times before. I assume “I Love My Wife and Kids”, “Have I Told You About My Personal Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ (Who Doesn’t Mind If I Get Rowdy Once In a While)?”, and a cover of “America, Fuck Yeah!” are just around the corner.

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New this week—2/28/10

Wednesday, March 3rd, 2010

Christopher Wilde
“Hero”, #57
“StarStruck” #77
“Something About the Sunshine” (with Anna Margaret), #81
Christopher Wilde, in case you’re not a connoiseur of the Disney Channel, is the name of the fictional teen heart-throb in Disney’s latest made-for-TV tweener extravaganza, StarStruck. The actor who does the singing here is Sterling Knight, who the folks at Disney are no doubt hoping will become a real heart-throb. As Disney soundtracks go, these three songs are above average, less cutesy than the Hannah Montana or High School Musical numbers, without all the cloying lyrical uplift. They’re also more mature. “StarStruck” includes a line about girls who want to take Christopher out on a date and make him holler, which in the Disney universe is as close as you can get to an NC-17 rating. Disney is obviously beginning to realize that the audience for its teen fantasies is older than it was when High School Musical debuted four years ago. Those tweeners are into their mid- to late-teens now, and they want a little romance, and even a suggestion of sex, with their song and dance. But even though these are more adult than the standard Disney fare, they’re also not up to the best of the non-soundtrack material that Disney artists like Miley Cyrus, Selena Gomez, and Aly & AJ have put out the last couple of years. “Starstruck” moves along nicely, but it has nothing new to say about fame (Lady GaGa would seem to have a lock on that theme at the moment), and though I like the bouncy/stretchy sound effects on “Something About the Sunshine”, it’s obvious they’re there to hide its other weaknesses. So I’ll give Disney an A for effort and for upping their game, but only a B for the results.

k.d. lang—”Hallelujah (Vancouver Winter 2010 Version)”
#61
A few weeks ago I was complaining about Justin Timberlake’s attempt to recontextualize this song after the earthquake in Haiti. But this, performed by Lang at the opening ceremonies of the Winter Olympics (and what a celebratory piece of work it is!) is even worse. Verse by verse, Lang drains every ounce of meaning out of the song, and then bathes the final chorus in one of the most banal string arrangements I’ve ever heard. Even at the peak of her popularity I thought Lang was overrated, but I never thought she’d get as bad this.

DJ Khaled featuring T-Pain, Ludacris, Snoop Dogg & Rick Ross—”All I Do Is Win”
#64
The frustrating thing about DJ Khaled (aside from his fuzzy, overloaded, melodramatic beats) is that he’s a one-idea man. That doesn’t need to be a detriment—a lot of DJs have made great records with less than an idea—but Khaled’s depends entirely on the guests he finagles into rapping on his productions. The result is an often irritating variation in quality, not just from record to record, but within each record itself. In this case, he gets a mediocre but passable hook from T-Pain, a slightly above-average rap from Ludacris, and an unintelligible, below-average rap from Rick Ross. Then, just as you’re getting ready for the wind-down of another tepid Khaled production, Snoop Dogg steps up to the mike, and in four lines blows a hole in the middle of the record. I’m not familiar enough with Snoop’s stuff to know whether he’s used these lines before—all I know is they’re better than anything else I’ve heard Snoop come up with, and just about any other rapper I can think of, as well. It’s not just a matter of the shock of Snoop’s laid-back style compared to the others’, either, because every time I listen to this record that verse seems even more powerful, more portentous, more menacing. The only thing I can compare it to is Lil Wayne’s rap on Khaled’s “We’re Takin’ Over” a couple of years ago. Exactly why Khaled’s productions should be so inspirational to these guys I have no idea. Maybe there’s more to those beats than I’m picking up on.

Usher—”There Goes My Baby”
#71
The best thing Usher has done in years (he appears to have been listening to a lot of Ne-Yo and Maxwell), but still far short of whatever mark he’s aiming for. Whoever or whatever made him decide to cut short the middle-eight, which would have brought the song to a higher level, should be booted out of his entourage, or his head, as quickly as possible.

3Oh!3 featuring Neon Hitch—”Follow Me Down”
#89
You knew once they stopped being offensive they’d be boring, right?

Mariah Carey featuring Nicki Minaj—”Up Out My Face”
#100
Over the last few years Carey has been making the best music of her career (not a great leap, I know)—just in time for her audience to dry up and everyone under the age of 25 to start ignoring her. Judging by this record, which is only slightly above average but which she obviously had a great time making, and by reports of her recent concert appearances, she doesn’t really care. Good for her. That’s the sort of attitude that could make her even better.

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New this week—2/21/10

Thursday, February 25th, 2010

Artists for Haiti—”We Are the World 25: For Haiti”
#2
Whatever else might be said, good or bad, about the original “We Are the World”, at least it was of its time. This new version, despite the urgency of the cause, or perhaps because of it, isn’t. Even more than the original it sounds self-serving and self-congratulatory, and though some have made a big deal of the addition of rappers to the mix, after 25 years their presence is neither surprising nor significant—if anything they make the record sound more dated. What is surprising is the anonymity of it all. On first listen the only voice I recognized was Justin Bieber’s, and after a few more go-rounds I’ve only been able to pick up on a few of the others. It’s not that the singers aren’t trying to be distinctive—if there’s such a thing as a melisma overdose this record could induce it—but they’ve all switched into sincere balladry mode and are trying their best to appear humble (in the most self-aggrandizing way), which tends to make them all sound alike. Let’s face it, ego is one of the driving forces of pop music, and successfully feeding it is as close as most pop stars get to emotional and intellectual achievement; without it they’re nothing.

Iyaz—”Solo”
#43
Second single, and he now sounds even more like Sean Kingston than the first time out. Which doesn’t make this bad, it just means that you’ve heard it before, and better.

General Larry Platt—”Pants On the Ground”
#46
A not very funny—not to mention years out of date—soundbite repeated obsessively for three and a half-minutes. I’m sure the General is a lovable old coot, and I hope he enjoys his five minutes of fame, but the best that can be said for this is that it’s better than William Hung.

Rihanna—”Rude Boy”
#64
Better than “Hard”, but only just. Considering Rihanna’s well-publicized personal history, the “treat me rough” message, though consensual and reciprocal, leaves a sour taste. I don’t want to go so far as to accuse her of capitalizing on her misfortunes, but I’m beginning to think the entirety of Rated R was a mistake.

Lloyd Banks featuring Juelz Santana—”Beamer, Benz, or Bentley”
#76
Banks is more than a second-rate 50 Cent, but not that much more, and he’s a lot cruder. He’s also a little behind the times: this sounds like a nostalgic flashback to 2004, back when cars and stacks could still impress all on their own.

Monica—”Everything To Me”
#82
An old-fashioned, unambitious soul number that never rises above its nostalgic impetus. Which is just a fancy way of saying it’s dull.

Waka Flacka Flame—”O Let’s Do It”
#95
There’s a part of me that’s glad somebody’s still making drug-dealer rap—the life exists, after all, and someone besides Ghostface Killah should be documenting it (though I doubt anyone else could be as good at it). So I appreciate the lyrical content. I just wish the music were better, or more connected to its subject matter, instead of this off-the-rack beat.

Kellie Pickler—”Didn’t You Know How Much I Loved You”
#99
Sweet and charming she may be, but Pickler’s talent is in the medium range, and ballads like this are beyond her. Of course, no one with above-average talent would choose material as generic as this to begin with.

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New this week–2/14/10

Tuesday, February 16th, 2010

P!nk—”Glitter In the Air”
#18
Even aside from the impressive aerial ballet on the Grammies, this song has a lot of things going for it, all of which P!nk somehow manages to subvert well before it’s over. It’s frustrating to see an artist of such obvious intelligence and craftsmanship constantly fall back on cliche in order to get through her songs, but that’s what she does, time and time again. Whenever she gets close to a real emotion she stops and whips out some tried and true piece of schtick. It’s almost as if she’s afraid. Either that or she’s not as smart as she seems.

Lil Wayne
“Knockout” (featuring Nicki Minaj), #44
“Fuck Today” (featuring Gudda), #76
“American Star” (featuring Shanell AKA SNL), #91
On first listen these seem a big step up from the Lil-Wayne-goes-metal tracks that have appeared off and on over the last year. The sound is brighter, the tempos have more snap to them, the songs even seem to be about something besides the usual rap bragging. But they wear thin fast, and though I’m fascinated by the sense of racial frustration that permeates them (especially “Fuck Today”, which is a far better version of the same idea than “Drop the World”), the simple fact is that these records don’t work. He may love it, but metal doesn’t do Wayne any favors: it slows him down and constrains his natural gifts, and leaves you wondering exactly what he’s trying to get at. I’m not even sure that Wayne knows. Does he think that metal will allow him to delve into a deeper and more profound form of rage than rap (since when?), or is he just bored? Someone should remind him that twenty years ago Ice-T pulled the same trick just as his own interest in rap was fading. After that his music career was pretty much over (and the Body Count album was a lot better than this). What a perfect time to go to jail.

Dave Matthews Band—”You and Me”
#57
For all his much vaunted skill and musical sophistication, it’s amazing how easily Matthews falls into cliche—hitting a high note on the word “fly” is about as old-fashioned and hackneyed as you can get—and all the rhythmic trickery in the world won’t cover up the fact that this song has virtually no melody; it’s just a collection of riffs strung together. I can understand why musos like him—I just don’t see why anyone else would care.

Kevin Rudolf featuring Birdman, Jay Sean, and Lil Wayne—”I Made It (Cash Money Heroes)”
#59
I find it hard to believe that anyone from New Orleans (I mean Lil Wayne, not Rudolf, who’s from New York), could ever find this sort of plodding, lugubrious mush appealing, but obviously that’s a regional stereotype I’ll need to reconsider. The chorus isn’t terrible, but it isn’t exactly fresh, either, and the raps are meaningless. Why would anyone, from anywhere, think it’s a good idea to play hair metal slowly?

Mary J. Blige and Andrea Bocelli—”Bridge Over Troubled Water”
#75
I missed Blige and Bocelli on the Grammy Awards, but I read somewhere that Blige appeared intimidated by Bocelli’s voice, to which I can only say “Huh?” Even forgetting for the moment that Bocelli can’t sing (not in English anyway, and I’m not sure about his Italian, either), Blige walks all over him. Not that that’s a good thing, since she walks all over the song, as well, but “Bridge Over Troubled Water” has a long and glorious history of being oversung, and I’d be the last to deny Blige her shot at it. I just wish she’d done it on her own—she might have taken it even more deeply into church.

Gucci Mane—”Lemonade”
#93
This is the most interesting Gucci Mane track I’ve heard, and easily the most eccentric. I haven’t been able to parse out enough of the lyrics to decide whether he’s saying anything worth hearing, but the music, especially the chorus (are those children singing or women’s voices electronically raised a couple of pitches?) holds my attention well enough even without being sure about what’s going on.

Shiny Toy Guns—”Major Tom”
#97
This record, which sounds like a bunch of semi-talented suburban middle-schoolers playing in a three car garage with two of the doors open to annoy the neighbors, provides further proof that with enough exposure in TV commercials—especially during the Grammy Awards—anybody can scrape into the bottom reaches of the Hot 100 for a week. That we already knew. What I want to know is how anybody could have dared to complain about Taylor Swift’s vocals with this blaring out of their TV every ten minutes?

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New this week—2/7/10

Tuesday, February 9th, 2010

For the second week in a row, the debuts are dominated by charity singles for Haiti. This week, though, except for Eddie Vedder’s wonderful cover of Bruce Springsteen, I’ve decided to let them pass without comment. I don’t have the heart to badmouth any more records pointed at such a worthy cause (as opposed to last week, when I was feeling cynical). Just for the record, though:

Sheryl Crow, Kid Rock, Keith Urban—”Lean On Me”, #47
Taylor Swift—”Breathless”, #72
Jennifer Hudson featuring The Roots—”Let It Be”, #98

The rest of the week’s crop, though, is surprisingly strong. Only one dud, and at least two tracks that will probably stand among the best of the year, at least in my estimation.

B.O.B. featuring Bruno Mars—”Nothin’ On You”
#89
Maybe I’m just a sucker, but I love this record. There’s nothing new here, and given time I could probably trace the original source of every hook (I wouldn’t need to look far, either), but it’s so beautifully put together I don’t see the point. As an encapsulation of a certain strain of southern hip-hop it’s just about perfect. It’s probably too soft for some people (there’s not single grating or negative moment in it), and it lacks a certain brashness, but that just means it’s as purely pop as you can get. I, for one, can never get enough of that sort of thing.

Eddie Vedder—”My City Of Ruins”
#92
I have my doubts about the gospel choir, but that’s the only weakness I can find in this performance, which not only cuts the Bruce Springsteen original, but just about everything that Eddie Vedder has ever done as well. Because Vedder is something of a softy, his voice lacks the stridency and the stiffness that often mars Springsteen’s own performances, and all the beauty and regret in the song comes though in a way Springsteen didn’t quite manage. Being reminded of what Vedder can do with a great song is enough to make me wonder if the only thing that’s really wrong with Pearl Jam is that they write their own material.

Jaheim—”Ain’t Leaving Without You”
#96
Since few people make records like this piece of early ’80s-style funk anymore, it sounds fresh and appealing. If this actually were the early ’80s, though, it would be just another one, and only slightly above average, at that.

Jason Michael Carroll—”Hurry Home”
#99
What’s worse than a manipulative country weeper? How about a manipulative country weeper that doesn’t succeed at manipulating anybody?

Roscoe Dash featuring Soulja Boy Tell’em—”All the Way Turnt Up”
#100
Whatever else you might think, there’s no denying that this song lives up to it’s title, with it’s crossing lines of melody and rhythm jacked up so high that after about two minutes it become wearing. As a flashing of musical and production skills it’s both impressive and intentionally obnoxious, and up to the point where my ears start to bleed I like it a lot. I do, however, find it impossible to tell Roscoe and Soulja Boy apart—though that might be intentional, I suppose.

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New this week—1/31/10

Sunday, January 31st, 2010

Taylor Swift—”Today Was a Fairytale”
#2
As songwriting, this is rehash; Swift has gone over the same ground many times before, though this pares the idea down to its basics in an appealing way. The real appeal, though, lies in the fact that, even more than the bonus tracks on the deluxe edition of Fearless, this clears away the production clutter that was that album’s greatest weakness. With every record Swift seems to have a clearer idea of what she’s aiming at and how best to attain it. She may be not just the biggest pop star of the moment, but also the smartest.

Justin Bieber featuring Ludacris—”Baby”
#5
Catchy and sweet, and even Ludacris keeps it clean (though it’s impossible for him to sound as innocent as Bieber does). Bieber is still doing a young Michael Jackson imitation and little else, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing, especially with hooks as catchy as this.

Jay-Z, Bono, The Edge & Rihanna—”Stranded (Haiti Mon Amour)”
#16
Despite Jay-Z’s confused attempt at making sense of tragedy and Bono’s meaningless plea for volunteers (who would only confuse things by this point) this is better than anyone had a right to expect. Jay keeps the song at groundlevel by emphasizing specific realities and personal loss, while Bono and Rihanna soar on the chorus. Jay-Z’s and Bono’s egos are incapable of not pushing their own agendas, but the overall effect manages to cancel both out. One of the few benefit records I’ve heard that may be worth listening to after the fact.

Justin Timberlake & Matt Morris featuring Charlie Sexton—”Hallelujah”
#48
This performance has a lot to recommend it, but I still find it irritating that “Hallelujah” has become the go-to song for anyone who wants to sound seriously spiritual and sincere, the same role previously played by “Amazing Grace” and “People Get Ready”. The problem is that “Hallelujah” isn’t really about spirituality so much as it uses spiritual imagery and Biblical references—David and Bathsheba, Samson and Delilah—as metaphors for the irresistible, baffling powers of love and lust. Cohen was singing about love and lust and music as acts of God, but not the kind of acts, like Haiti, to which that phrase normally refers. He wasn’t channeling the Book of Job, he was channeling The Song of Solomon. Timberlake and Morris sing beautifully—I especially like the way their voices seem to break and strain as they reach for the final notes, as if singing “hallelujah” in these circumstance was both the hardest and most important thing one could do—but the song doesn’t mean what they try to make it mean, and in this context it’s confusing more than anything else.

Lady Antebellum—”Our Kind of Love”
#80
Better than the last two singles-of-the-week, not as good as the first two, which adds up to mediocre.

Rihanna—”Redemption Song”
#81
Rihanna has a voice, and she wisely keeps this rough and tries her best to focus on the emotion, but she isn’t much of a singer, and the song is beyond her. It would be unfair to compare her to Marley, and this is a hard song to sing under any circumstances, much less under the time constraints she was working with here, but this sounds unsure and amateurish. And the background, except for the guitar part lifted largely from Marley’s original, is pure mush.

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New this week—1/24/10

Wednesday, January 27th, 2010

Sade—”Soldier of Love”
#58
Sonically this is stunning, especially the drums, which switch seamlessly in sound from a military tattoo to distant artillery to nearby gunfire—it’s enough to make you believe that they spent the entire eight years between albums getting the sound right. The lyrics are banal, though, no matter how gorgeously sung or perfectly set they may be. Their/her attention to musical detail is so complete that they seem to have completely missed the oxymoron in the title, or considered the possibility that they’ve never found real love because they think of it as a battlefield to begin with. That’s the trouble with perfectionism: once it latches onto an idea, it can’t abide contradictions.

Lady Antebellum–”Ready To Love Again”
#72
The ever-more-questionable single-a-week campaign continues, and sure enough, here comes the dreck. This sounds like the closing credits music for some Lifetime Channel original movie. Should you really issue four singles to preview your new LP if it’s only two singles deep?

Jay-Z + Swizz Beats—”On To the Next One”
#78
Jay-Z sounds fine (though a bit defensive—when has anyone actually accused him of being a virgin?), but the real star is Swizz Beats, who seems to have decided to take up where Timbaland left off (or gave up). His productions have always been fun, but this one has just enough added seriousness and menace to take it up another level.

Snow Patrol featuring Martha Wainwright—”Set the Fire To the Third Bar”
#86
As far as I’m concerned, any guy who writes a line like “the laughter penetrates my silence” doesn’t deserve to be reunited with his girlfriend, no matter how many lonely bars he mutely wanders through. He certainly doesn’t deserve Martha Wainwright, who nonetheless almost succeeds in saving the song, if only because her sweet, simple harmonies distract you from the relentless downtrodden wallow of the lead vocal.

Miley Cyrus—”When I Look At You”
#88
Is this what we have to look forward to when Cyrus gives up pop and “matures”? Me, I prefer the Disney stuff, even the cutesy nonsense, to preening power ballads like this. And I’ll bet you whatever you like that the last Hannah Montana soundtrack album will be better than anything Cyrus releases after she leaves Disney.

Keith Urban—”‘Til Summer Comes Around”
#92
The music is so portentous and the images so dismal—wintry silence, deserted carnival rides, etc.—that this could almost be taken for one of Bruce Springsteen’s post-industrial wasteland songs. Except Springsteen’s songs are about the death of community, the decline of the nation’s principals and ideals, spiritual devastation at both a personal and societal level. Urban’s song is about missing a girl he made out with on a Ferris Wheel once. The imagery is so overwhelming compared to the subject that after awhile it becomes the subject, which—and I would hope that it’s needless to point this out—isn’t the way songs are supposed to work.

Zac Brown Band—”Highway 20 Ride”
#98
A standard country divorce weeper, with extra dollops of self-pity. Brown spends most of the song feeling so sorry for himself he barely addresses the son he’s supposedly talking to. Maybe he should stick to Jimmy Buffett rip-offs and leave the real emotions to people who have some.

Pearl Jam—”Just Breathe”
#99
Let’s face it, if it weren’t for the first Doors LP, Ten would probably be the worst “classic” album ever to grace the rock canon. Now, twenty years later, they’re still making the same mistakes: taking sentiment for real emotion, sincerity for real ideas, and vocal and instrumental texture for interesting music. They mean well, and they’ve gotten better, but too often that’s the only good thing that can be said about them. In this case, I wouldn’t even say they’ve gotten better.

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New this week—1/17/10

Saturday, January 16th, 2010

Ke$ha
“Blah Blah Blah” (featuring 3Oh!3), #7
“Your Love Is My Drug”, #27
“Take It Off”, #85
It’s hard not to think of Ke$ha as Reality-TV-Pop, with a musical persona not far removed from the ladies on Jersey Shore. That’s at least better, in some ways, than thinking of her as a female version of 3Oh!3, or a full time Fergie-in-party-mode. The music is suitably garish and blaring, the vocal phrasing party-girl flat, and the character that of a woman who thinks she’s a goddess because she can take five straight shots and still stand up. She explores this a little more deeply and humorously on some of the album cuts—especially “Party At a Rich Dude’s House” (she throws up in the closet) and “Dinosaur”, which is about creepy older men hitting her up—but these three cuts (plus “Tik Tok”) provide everything you really need to know. If you really want to know, that is.

Lady Antebellum—”Love This Pain”
#93
There’s nothing wrong with wearing your influences on your sleeve, especially in country music, but when those influences slip from Fleetwood Mac to Bon Jovi, it’s probably not a good idea to emphasize them by releasing the results as a single.

Timbaland featuring Drake—”Say Something”
#94
Listen to the background and you’ll notice that, as a producer, Timbaland is still capable of making interesting music. As a rapper, though, he has nothing to say, and Drake doesn’t have much more. And the music isn’t all that interesting.

Easton Corbin—”A Little More Country Than That”
#100
I love the conceit of this, where Corbin rattles off a few country and small town cliches, and then pronounces himself even more country in a tone both good humored and dismissive. He then digs behind the cliches and defines country as a form of honor and emotional honesty. It’s a neat trick, and Corbin wisely plays it as low key as possible. Though the song doesn’t build in the way it possibly should, it’s a neat llittle package.

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New this week—1/10/10

Tuesday, January 12th, 2010

Lil Wayne featuring Eminem—”Drop the World”
#18
Unbelievable. The lyrics sound like a Junior High student trying to sound tough and “realistic” (that is, cynical and negative by rote), the music an overblown attempt to accompany a melody that doesn’t exist. Eminem fares better, since he at least understands the form—which Lil Wayne obviously doesn’t—and knows how to pull some interesting rhythmic change-ups within it. But his lyrics aren’t much better than Lil Wayne’s, and no one could save a record as conceptually misguided as this, anyway. Lil Wayne seems to have reached that unfortunate point faced by so many great talents, at which they begin to believe that anything they touch will be marked by genius. Chances are he’ll recover; but will we?

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