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Hot 100 Roundup—1/21/12

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

Jason Mraz—“I Won’t Give Up”
#8
Being the minor talent that he is, I expected Mraz to play it safe with a snappy sound-alike to “I’m Yours” for his next single, but it seems his talent is so minor he doesn’t realize where his best interests lie. This is super-serious, packed thick with sincere clichés that appear to have been lifted at random from self-help books. Each verse ends either with an affirmation or a “deep” question: “I had to learn what I’ve got, and what I’m not, and who I am”; “God knows we’re worth it”; and my favorite, “How old is your soul?” These seem to have no connection to the lines that precede them, or a connection so vague that only those well versed in the jargon could understand them. I’m not sure that group includes Mraz. Just to give him the benefit of the doubt, I’d like to think this is intended as parody, but the music suggests otherwise. Which means that Mraz probably isn’t even a minor talent. He is a cad, though. That I know for sure.

Skrillex featuring Sirah—“Kyoto”
#74
Skrillex is polishing and improving his sound with every record. “Kyoto” adds a guest rap, but otherwise uses the same basic formula as his previous singles: establish a familiar groove with a hyped, bass heavy mix, stop dead with a scream of urgent exclamation, followed by a needle drop and all hell breaking loose, repeat, then end on the original groove. The big difference here is that the shifts are less dramatic, the change in style almost seamless (the fact that he’s working with hip-hop rhythms may have something to do with that). Whatever you may think of him, he’s a talent, and he isn’t stupid, his music is growing and developing. How far that development goes is another question: the clichéd “Japanese” melody here suggests that his musical sensibilities, however broad they may be, aren’t very deep.

3OH!3—“Set You Free”
#84
Another couple of minor talents who aren’t as smart as they think they are. I’m not saying that electro-clash can’t be used to transmit a “serious” message, but it does tend to take the “clash” out of it, which means it’s missing all the fun and most of reason for its existence. I like the line “I don’t live in bed no more”, but otherwise this is boring, pretentious, and self-pitying. They don’t even sound like themselves, they sound like Weezer fans with sequencers. Ke$ha should heed the warning: this is where taking yourself seriously gets you.

Gotye featuring Kimbra—“Somebody That I Used to Know”
#91
Imported from Belgium, this sounds like it could become the sort of sleeper hit that “Pumped Up Kicks” was, only without the pretentious seriousness. The mid-sixties Latin groove (courtesy of Luiz Bonfa’s “Seville”) gives it the feel of a Nancy Sinatra-Lee Hazlewood track, minus the camp value of Hazlewood’s singing. And the woman’s part, which starts with the best line in the song, “Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over”, carries echoes of Human League’s “Don’t You Want Me”. In other words, this contains references to enough pop landmarks, without any of them being obvious on first listen, to make it sound both familiar and out of the ordinary.

Montgomery Gentry—“Where I Come From”
#94
For the most part, I don’t mind country songs praising small town life—two of my favorite records of the last few years are Miranda Lambert’s “Famous In a Small Town” and Ashton Shepard’s “More Cows Than People”—but this is so aggressive, and so defensive, that it comes close to a kind or rural fascism. Their examples of small town life are bizarre, especially the lines about two guys fighting in a parking lot: “Nobody’s gonna call the cops”. So that’s what’s wrong with big cities; it’s not that people fight in the streets, it’s that people insist on summoning the authorities when they do. Better yet is the old man sitting on the porch who can “buy your fancy car with hundred dollar bills”. What is he, a rapper? A meth dealer? Whatever the case, I bet he drives an old beat-up pickup truck covered in mud when he takes his mother to church on Sunday morning. They always do.

Jay-Z Kanye West—“Gotta Have It”
#98
Is this actually being promoted as a single? If it is, it’s an odd choice. For starters, it isn’t even two and a half minutes long, which means it won’t fit on any existing radio formats. Second, though the James Brown sample provides a great hook, it isn’t up there with “Niggas In Paris” in sing- or hum-along terms. It does, however, continue in a more obvious way the theme of racial politics and black history that “Niggas” snuck in between the lines. Have they got some kind of thematic singles campaign going that they’re not telling anyone about? Or are they just being eccentric?

Listen on Spotify

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Hot 100 Roundup—10/22/11

Thursday, November 3rd, 2011

Daughtry—”Crawling Back to You”
#41
The hook sticks in your head, but only because you’ve heard it a thousand times already. Fans of this kind of stuff can probably sing along after the first two or three notes, which I’m sure is a large part of its appeal. There isn’t an original or interesting idea anywhere on it. Not that that’s a surprise.

Hot Chelle Rae featuring New Boyz—”I Like It Like That”
#51
This is like 3Oh!3 for the younger crowd (what became of those guys, anyway?), and if it wasn’t for the presence of the New Boyz, might be considered as an audition for the next Kidz Bop collection. The New Boyz, however, though they keep it clean, also add a bit of personality, which is the last thing a Kidz Bop record would want. They’re still good enough that I wish they weren’t so obviously at the mercy of the industry, and I only hope they don’t get every ounce of talent, or their regard for each other, squeezed out of them before their contract expires.

Glee Cast
“Fix You”, #53
“Run the World (Girls)”, #91

Taio Cruz featuring Flo Rida—”Hangover”
#62
I like this a lot, mostly because I get the feeling that Taio Cruz is secretly putting forth an anti-drinking message, or at least an anti-drinking-to-excess message. When he brags about drinking till he throws up I always catch the whiff of satire, no matter how hard the beat is pumping in the background. Satire, of course, is beyond Flo Rida, because most of what he says is incomprehensible anyway. He does claim that he never throws up, so maybe he considers satire unmanly.

T.I. featuring Big K.R.I.T.—”I’m Flexin’”
#66
I can’t think of any particular reason to recommend this track. The flow is good, the raps intelligent, but neither T.I. or K.R.I.T. have anything important or interesting to say, which may explain why the music seems old-hat and lacking in punch.

Enrique Iglesias featuring Pitbull & The WAV.s—”I Like How It Feels”
#76
This record confuses me. I like the openness of the arrangement, and the beats sound like they were made with live drums (probably not, but that’s how they sound), but the lyrics are weird. The first verse sounds like a standard dance track, with an odd reference to the It Gets Better project tossed in for no apparent reason. Then the second verse is all we-can-save-the-world-if-we-stand-together. Then Pitbull enters, and since all he’s ever been able to rap about is sex, he does that for a while, and then the record ends. My assumption is that Iglesias was just stringing words together and callously cashing in on an internet meme. Then again, if Pitbull wasn’t on here, I might wonder if this wasn’t Iglesias’ confused idea of a coming out song. I have no real evidence to back that up, and it probably isn’t true, but weirder things have happened.

Big Sean—”Dance(A$$)”
#93
This is like a Busta Rhymes track without Busta. Why exactly did Kanye West sign this guy? Because he reflects West’s id (or anybody’s, really) without the limitations of conscience, intelligence, or taste?

Beyonce featuring Andre 3000—”Party”
#95
I haven’t heard the J. Cole remix that is apparently replacing this for the video and radio, but it can’t possibly be better. This is a good record, especially the harmonies on the chorus, but Andre is the only thing that makes it special. His rap is about being older, about not partying, but being looked up to by the kids who are. It adds a level of contemplation to the song that’s only hinted at in the mature groove of the arrangement. I’ve heard that some people think Andre is slipping as a rapper. I think he’s entering a realm that those people don’t understand.

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Hot 100 Roundup—1/2/11

Thursday, January 6th, 2011

The Lonely Island featuring Akon—”I Just Had Sex”
#30
Akon is funny, and his willingness to parody his persona makes me respect him a little more, but he’s not as funny as T-Pain was on “I’m On a Boat”, and the jokes, even when they’re good, are obvious. The formula is getting old, too. There are times when this sounds exactly like Flight of the Conchords, only not as good.

Brad Paisley—”This Is Country Music”
#65
Paisley has enjoyed an aesthetic and commercial peak over the last two years, the sort of thing only the best can pull off, and you can’t blame him for engaging in some sentimental celebration. The sentiment wins out over the celebration, though, and once the cliches start piling up even Paisley’s guitar can’t dig him out from under. It all feels tossed together, and not in a good way.

3Oh!3—”Hit It Again”
#66
Catchy enough, and less offensive than usual, which isn’t really a compliment. Record by record they become more ordinary, and this features a chorus that’s as close to old-fashioned rock and roll as they’ve ever come. The one thing the world doesn’t need.

Troop 41—”Do the John Wall”
#81
More teenage hip-hoppers with another new dance, this one based on basketball (the jump-shot move is silly even by fly-by-night dance trend standards). They’re from North Carolina, so the sound is more Dirty South/Soulja Boy than jerkin’ or dougie—more baroque and with more fuzzy synths. The spirit and the energy are the same, though, and I can’t think of anything that would be better for pop’s future than cross-country dance-move battles. There must be room on cable for that somewhere.

B.O.B.—”I Am the Champion”
#85
I still have my doubts about B.O.B.’s strengths as a rapper—especially when he follows up a claim to never being imitative with spoken asides that sound exactly like Will Smith—but he knows how to pick hooks and beats, and this is his best record since “Nothin’ On You”. His nonchalant self-absorption is almost charming, and he knows how to brag without being overbearing. If anything, he’s less of a goof here than on previous records, but he still sounds like he’s after nothing but a good time.

Train—”Shake Up Christmas (Coke Xmas Anthem)”
#99
Since almost every band in the world hoped to wake up Christmas morning with a licensing or endorsement deal in their stocking, I can hardly blame these bozos for locking up this year’s official Coca-Cola Christmas song. Not that they need the money or the attention, but if they want to be The New Seekers of the two-teens that’s their privilege. Just as it’s my privilege to never listen to it again unless I’m stuck in a mall.

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Hot 100 Roundup—10/17/10

Sunday, October 24th, 2010

Taylor Swift—”Speak Now”
#8
Another cute fairy tale, a song form at which Swift has become an absolute master. Sassy, funny, and sharply observed as always, only this one is streaked with some real bitterness, including details and descriptions that would be considered, um, mean coming from anyone else. As the title cut from the new album, it obviously serves as justification for the deeper anger that permeates some of the other songs. Like most fairy tales, however, this ends at the point of victory, and says nothing about the aftermath. Which makes me wonder if Swift, both as a character in her songs and as a real person, is ready for the tempest she’s stirring up.

Kanye West featuring Pusha T—”Runaway”
#12
Ever since 808s and Heartbreak, and even more so since his disastrous VMA fuck-up, the main focus of Kanye West’s audience, and certainly the press, has been not his music, but his state of mind. Is he falling apart? Does he regret what he’s done? Will he apologize? Will the new record present a more humble, subdued Yeezy? The answers so far (No. Yes. Sort of. Are you kidding me?) are fascinating in their way, but they distract from the main point, which is the music. In the last three months he’s released two excellent official singles, plus a boatload of good to great tracks as part of the G.O.O.D. Friday download series, and all I read on the blogs and in comment sections is analysis of his emotional ups and downs, as if every new piece of music were nothing more than the latest installment in a soap opera: Kanye West and the Price of Fame or As the Rapper Yearns. Part of this is West’s fault—his self-absorption is far beyond the call of duty of even the most egotistical rappers—but at the same time he’s one of the few whose work lives up to their own hype. And even if the latest records break little new ground—“Power” harks all the way back to The College Dropout, while “Runaway” sounds like an 808s track with some pop sweetening—the ideas he’s already dug up would be enough to fuel any number of lifelong careers. If, that is, he doesn’t drive his into the ground by making music about nothing but himself. It’s a narrowing of the palette that few artists survive, no matter how brilliant they are. I just hope this album gets it all out of his system and he can go on to something else.

Glee Cast
“I Want To Hold Your Hand”, #36
“One Of Us”, #37
“Only the Good Die Young”, #50
“Losing My Religion”, #60
“Papa Can You Hear Me?”, #65
“Bridge Over Troubled Water”, #73
“I Look To You”, #74

P!nk—”Raise Your Glass”
#51
For a Max Martin-produced party record this is surprisingly stiff, never more so than in the throwaway vocal interjections that are supposed to provide that loose, freaky atmosphere (and all the jokes). It’s all far too calculated and machine-tooled, without a single moment left to chance. I don’t know if this is Martin’s fault or P!nk’s, but it sure isn’t freaky.

Bruno Mars—”The Lazy Song”
#82
Dear Bruno Mars: You can be a pop guy with serious undertones, or you can be a serious guy with an instinctive pop sensibility, but you cannot be Jack Johnson with keyboards. Not if you want any respect, that is.

A Rocket To the Moon—”Like We Used To”
#91
One of those records that’s upended by the details guys like this learn to put into their songs in their Songwriting 101 class. Pleading with an ex-girlfriend you caught naked in a car with somebody else fourteen months ago does not make you sensitive or passionate—it makes you a wimp. As does the music and the vocals.

Edward Maya & Vika Jigulina—”Stereo Love”
#93
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 10/10/10

David Guetta featuring Kid Cudi—”Memories”
#94
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 10/3/10

Shakira featuring Dizzee Rascal—”Loca”
#98
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 10/10/10

Bubbling Under

Justin Moore—”How I Got To Be This Way”
#101
By being kicked in the head by a horse, apparently. This explains a lot.

Ne-Yo—”One In a Million”
#102
This is the catchiest and most pop-oriented of the preview singles off Ne-Yo’s new album, which also means it’s the most familiar sounding and the most ordinary. Ne-Yo’s style and class set him apart from almost everybody else on the chart, but they also hold him back somehow. It feels as if he’s not telling us everything he could because he’s afraid of stepping outside of the image he’s concocted for himself. Maybe it’s time for him to be a little less of a gentleman, or at least find an outlet for the tension that stance implies.

Trace Adkins—”This Ain’t No Love Song”
#103
In fact, it’s barely a song at all.

Luke Bryan—”Someone Else Calling You Baby”
#104
Bryan is a decent, mid-level country singer, and this is interesting for being essentially 70s country pop with a more soulful, modern rock setting, The Bellamy Brothers turned up to 11. Past 11, actually, which is the problem.

Willow—”Whip My Hair”
#105
This is far better than anyone had a right to suspect, and surprising, as well. Willow’s voice is literally unbelievable—it’s not just the strength, but the mature phrasing—if I hadn’t already known I never would have suspected her real age; I would have gone for thirty. The track is rougher than you’d think, as well, a poppified mix of electro and crunk that never lets up. Tougher than anything her dad ever did, that’s for sure.

My Darkest Days featuring Ludacris—”Porn Star Dancing”
#106
With Nickleback’s Chad Kroeger as co-writer and co-producer doing his best 3Oh!3 impersonation, the presence of Ludacris helps this record achieve a perfect storm of demographic triangulation. The sheer commercial shamelessness of it almost makes its stripper pole sleaze appealing. Kind of catchy, too.

Lifehouse—”All In”
#108
If it were anybody else turning to poker metaphors to describe their passion, I’d assume they were shooting for a country crossover, but these guys sound like the same old boring rockers they’ve always been. Only without hooks. It doesn’t mean much to go all in if all you’ve got left is a couple of bucks.

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Hot 100 Roundup—9/5/10

Thursday, September 9th, 2010

Kid Cudi featuring Kanye West—”Erase Me”
#22
Nerd rap has been around for a while, of course, but so far I don’t think anyone has has taken the trouble to mix it with nerd rock. So here it is: Kid Cudi rapping over what sounds like a stripped down Weezer track, complete with strained falsetto climax in the chorus. Whether this is a good idea or a bad one depends on execution, and here Cudi delivers nothing but cliches, while West creates a fictional woman whom he calls Maria simply so he can use her name to create a pun on diarrhea. Nerd doesn’t have to mean immature, guys, honest it doesn’t.

Jason Aldean—”My Kinda Party”
#54
Aldean’s kind of party appears to be somewhat slow, with the same elegiac rock touches that Kenny Chesney put on “The Boys of Fall”. Does this mean that the old ways are fading, or that Aldean’s just getting old? Unless he comes up with something beside the same old cliches, I guess we’ll never know.

Katy Perry—”Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)
#67
In terms of persona, Katy Perry is a naughty girl, but she’s not a dirty one. She isn’t a drunken slut like Ke$ha or a coked-up horndog like the guys in 3Oh!3. Partying isn’t her life, it’s just something that she does when she has some spare time at the end of the week. If she gets arrested, or ends up in a menage a’ trois, it’s not a big deal, they’re just a couple more items on the list of things she does when she gets a little too tipsy. Though I don’t think much of this song (it’s too calculated, and Perry makes the mistake of repeating jokes that should be one-time throwaways), I like its “that’s life” attitude, and how non-judgmental it is—her partying isn’t a point of pride, but it isn’t anything to be ashamed of either. Which suggests that her Christian upbringing wasn’t quite as strict or narrow as people tend to imagine.

YG—”Toot It and Boot It”
#92
The great thing about the current crop of LA rappers, whether they’re jerkin’ or not, is how relaxed and off the cuff they sound. Talking dirty means nothing to them (and this is the first hit on the charts to get anywhere near the general level of horniness of most young underground rap in LA), and the general attitude is one of relaxed acceptance of the good things that come their way. What’s more, most everything that comes their way is good; aside from party anthems these are some of the least negative rap records I’ve ever heard. Here, YG presents a perfect encapsulation of the idea, and if you’re offended by his “fuck ‘em and forget em’” theme, he would like you to know that women can toot it and boot it, too.

Cee Lo Green—”Fuck You!”
#96
What’s so surprising about the reaction to this great record is that after over a decade of graphic rap records finding their way onto the charts, its language still has the power to shock. Largely that’s because this is a pop record—and a great up, at that—and though pop records often deal in broken romance, they rarely deal in the anger stage of the grieving process, and when they do they tend not to sound so bright and catchy. The retro-soul arrangement adds to the effect, by seeming to come from, and pay homage to, an era when those sorts of words never appeared on pop records. Of course, if you do a little digging you can find alternate versions of some big pop hits with amazingly dirty lyrics, often recorded by the original artists as a break from their clean-cut facades (check out Jackie Wilson and Lavern Baker’s “Think Twice (Version X)” some time). Cee Lo’s just working the idea in reverse.

Toby Keith—”Trailerhood”
#97
I’d appreciate the bouncy friendliness of this song a lot more if every verse didn’t start with a promising idea that went nowhere. Just when you think Keith is going to break through a cliche he comes back with another one. Tom T. Hall he ain’t.

Jazmine Sullivan—”Holding You Down (Goin’ In Circles)”
#98
Every time I hear this song I like it more, but every time it seems more like a lost opportunity as well. The problem isn’t Sullivan, who has matured since her last album and will probably make great records in the future, but Missy Elliott’s production, which is too weird and hit and miss to work. There are great moments here, including some of a soulful intensity that’s truly surprising, but too much of the rest, with the constant shoutouts and odd sounds coming from nowhere, is confusing and inexplicable. Maybe someday I’ll understand, but right now this sounds like an experiment that doesn’t quite come off.

Josh Thompson—”Way Out Here”
#100
Yet another country elegy, only this one sounds both pumped up and defensive. It opens and closes with a threat, and in between spouts enough defiant rural cliches to sound like a candidate for a Tea Party anthem. I wonder how Johnny cash would feel about being on Thompson’s list of of what people “way out here” are all about.

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The year so far, ctd.

Monday, July 26th, 2010

When I was doing my half-year summation last week, an idea struck me that I didn’t have time to include. As I said there, the apparent greatness of the year overall hasn’t made much of an impression on the pop charts, at least not in terms of individual records. As the old saying goes, though, a rising tide lifts all boats, and though I think it’s fair to say that there have been few great records on the Hot 100 this year, the quality, overall, has risen.

Quality, however, may not be the right word; freshness may be closer to the truth. Since the crash and burn of the summer of 2008, there has been a slow but steady revitalization. Pop music sounds different than it did three years ago. On the top forty charts, the touchstones are obvious. With Lady GaGa and the revamped Blacked Eyed Peas leading the way, followed by 3Oh!3, Ke$ha, and quickly adapting older artists like Rihanna and Jay-Z, electronica in one form or another has become a staple on the pop charts, to the point where even Disney stars like Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez are jumping on the bandwagon (to be fair to Disney, Aly & AJ were actually ahead of the curve on this). At the same time, the pop embrace of electronica has forced those in the electronic music scene itself to up their game and look for new ideas to separate them from the mainstream (a process aided by the cross-pollination provided by DJ podcasts like those found at Resident Advisor, XLR8R, and Fact Magazine—check out Michaelangelo’s piece in the Guardian for an overview). At the same time, thanks to its exposure on the charts, electronica is garnering an ever-expanding fan base of more adventurous pop listeners.

Hip-hop and rap have also been reflecting the inspiration provided by electronic music. Unlike pop, however, the major changes are coming from smaller scenes outside the mainstream. While stars like T.I. and DJ Khaled fill their records with ever more baroque permutations of fuzzy synths, the whole of hip-hop is being remade from underneath by teenagers with lap tops. From Soulja Boy Tell’em in Mississippi to the jerkin’ movement in LA to Cali Swag District’s “Teach Me How To Dougie”, which puts an LA spin on a dance movement originating in Dallas, the movement in one form or another has gone nationwide. All that laptop rap needs now is an independently-minded genius to blow it wide open (Soulja Boy and New Boyz, unfortunately, have already been absorbed by the old guard).

Beyond the influence of electronica (and yes, I know that phrase is out of date, but find me another that covers the whole spectrum), other genres are being revamped as well, especially country. Up until a couple of years ago, country was ruled by good ol’ boys like Toby Keith and Tim McGraw and Kenny Chesney, who sang, for the most part, about only one thing: how good it is to be a good ol’ boy. In the last two years, though, women have come back strong: Gretchen Wilson started the ball rolling, with Miranda Lambert following closely behind, then Carrie Underwood (whose “Before He Cheats” provided the ultimate kiss off to the good ol’ boy genre), with Kellie Pickler, Sugarland, Lady Antebellum, Rory and Joey, and a host of others quickly occupying the landscape. In a category all their own are Taylor Swift and Brad Paisley, who have brought an intelligent, charming, good-humored sensibility back to country that it’s been missing for over a decade. The good ol’ boys are still around, but their voices are muted. Many of them are trying to meet the women half way, and the result has been a batch of pleasant, if not always brilliant records that feel far more down to earth and human.

Interesting changes have taken place on the indie and alternative scenes as well, but for the moment none of those have been turning up in the pop charts. Not that that isn’t a possibility. As far as I can tell, the only major difference in sound between Ke$ha and Sleigh Bells is the mix: Ke$ha mixes her distorted electronic explosions down and her voice up; Sleigh Bells does the opposite. They may be on different paths, but they’re heading in the same direction. Everybody is. And somewhere down the road is a convergence point that’s going to blow everybody away.

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New this week—7/11/10

Monday, July 12th, 2010

Kanye West featuring Dwele—”Power”
#22
Listening to West in comparison to most other rap artists is something like listening to Ray Charles in comparison to most other R&B artists of the ’50s; his sophistication, both musically and lyrically, his intelligence, his sensibility, are so far above his peers that essentially there is no comparison, he functions in a universe all his own. Which doesn’t mean that everything he touches is golden. “Power” is as lyrically ambiguous as you might expect: he loves power, he hates power, it elevates him, it destroys him, it makes him love his life, it makes him want to kill himself, etc.—he’s obviously been thinking about the issue, hard. But all that doubt makes the record itself sound confused, and musically it’s a move backward. I don’t blame him for stepping away from the despair he plumbed on 808s and Heartbreak and his subsequent public implosion, but I didn’t expect him to go all the way back to College Dropout. That reliance on music he knows by heart is the surest sign of how uncertain he is. Journeyman work, but hardly groundbreaking.

Christina Perri—”Jar of Hearts”
#63
We have So You Think You Can Dance to thank for this sentimental grab bag making the Hot 100, though how anyone could dance to such meandering nonsense is beyond me. Perri starts off sounding like Colbie Caillat, ends up like she’s on Broadway, and tries on a half dozen other vocal styles, including Glee, in between. Unfortunately, all the stylistic confusion only puts a greater emphasis on her lyrics: “You’re gonna catch a cold/From the ice inside your soul”. Yeah, yeah. Pass me the tissues.

Flo Rida featuring David Guetta—”Club Can’t Handle Me”
#65
Whatever else you might say about him, there’s no denying that Flo Rida is a master of the hook. Anybody who can make David Guetta sound bearable must be doing something right. But hook is all this is, and even compared to Flo Rida’s other singles it’s so brainless it defies any attempt at actual concentration (I imagine it’s a different story on the dance floor, though). Worst of all, those anonymous background vocals remind me of something you might hear on Glee, and it wouldn’t surprise me if this showed up on an episode next season. If that’s not an ominous portent for the future of pop, I don’t know what is.

Lil Jon featuring LMFAO—”Outta Your Mind”
#84
This is more like it. LMFAO are insignificant enough that they don’t get in the way of Lil Jon’s crunk barrage (and even provide a not bad hockey pun, the second this week—there’s one on “Power”, too), and without having to worry about stupid concepts like melody and musicality, he’s free to be his crazy drunk self. Actual title (based on lyrical repetition): “I Don’t Give a Fuck”.

Chris Brown featuring Tyga & Kevin McCall—”Deuces”
#87
Brown is either intent on destroying his career or he’s the dumbest guy in pop music. It’s one thing to put out yet another track about what a bitch your ex is, another to add to your wrongs by featuring 1) a bad Drake impersonation (is it too soon to ask for a ban on raps that start “Uh…”?), and 2) a guy who makes dumb oral sex jokes and tasteless references to Ike and Tina Turner. This is technically a mixtape cut, so I suppose Brown can always backtrack and say he didn’t really mean it, but since he made a video to go with the damn thing, I can’t imagine anyone will be convinced. He’ll always have his apologists, but his career is essentially over. Or if it isn’t it should be.

WE the Kings featuring Demi Lovato—”We’ll Be A Dream”
#95
You go right ahead. I’ll be asleep.

Josh Turner—”All Over Me”
#97
As funky as country gets—the New Orleans breakdown piano on the intro is great—but lyrically it’s just another making love out in the sticks song, no better or worse than dozens of others. And country, needless to say, never gets all that funky.

Enrique Iglesias featuring Juan Luis Guerra—”Cuando Me Enamoro”
#99
I might feel different if I could understand the Spanish, but Iglesias sounds a lot less smarmy in this context than when he sings in English. Once again, though, he comes across as less talented than his guest, and though this is pleasant, with a nice groove and interesting Beatlesish touches, it’s nothing special.

3OH!3—”I Can Do Anything”
#100
This will probably work great live, with thousand of drunken beach partiers chanting along, but on record it’s sluggish and plodding, especially for what might be called a statement of purpose. That’s what they get for thinking.

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New this week—6/27/10

Sunday, July 4th, 2010

Drake
“Up All Night” featuring Nicki Minaj, #49
“9 AM In Dallas”, #57
“Fireworks” featuring Alicia Keys, #71
“Fancy” featuring T.I. & Swiss Beatz, #99
Approached in bulk, Drake’s tracks achieve a definite if subliminal groove that is, at first, both attractive and of a certain clinical interest. The same can be said of his raps, which are straightforward and plainspoken. But if you’re going to be this plainspoken you’d better make sure you have something to say and have some poetry hidden in there somewhere. Drake has neither, and after a few plays his minimal grooves become boring. When Drake says he wants to be a real artist, I believe him, but I believe him even more when he expresses doubts about his talent. His honesty may get him somewhere eventually, but it hasn’t yet.

Disturbed—”Another Way To Die”
#81
Environmental metal: it’s not quite an oxymoron, but it sure doesn’t make much sense.

3Oh!3—”Double Vision”
#89
When you limit your musical palette as much as these guys do—they don’t write new melodies or rhythms for each record, they just switch rhyme schemes—the smallest change or addition can come as a surprise. Here, they add a few pleasant harmonies and suddenly sound almost as upbeat and friendly as The Beach Boys. They should be careful, though: too many cracks in their obnoxious facade and they’ll start to get boring.

Soulja Boy Tell’em—”Pretty Boy Swag”
#90
Not so much a change in style as a change in speed, and a smart move. The slow, deliberate, teasing pace makes Soulja Boy sound more mature without diminishing the feeling that’s he’s still just a teenager having a great time with something he loves. That’s almost enough to make him important, even if all he raps about is how cool he is.

Bobby Brackins featuring Ray J—”143″
#91
Ray J seems to make his living now attaching himself to young rappers, where he applies his seductive crooning, reminds everybody of his biggest hit, and smooths out any rough spots that would make these records interesting. Though I’m not sure Brackins would be interesting even without him.

The Dirty Heads featuring Rome—”Lay Me Down”
#93
Unbelievable. A Jack Johnsonish acoustic reggae ballad with a plot that is basically a rehash of The Getaway—the movie version, that is, where the beautiful young couple get away with robbery and murder to spend the rest of their lives having sex on the beach, as opposed to Jim Thompson’s original novel, which had an ending so depressing, ironic, and horrifying that even Sam Peckinpah didn’t have the nerve to serve it up on screen. You should read it, if only to understand me when I wish The Dirty Heads a less final but somewhat similar fate.

Jaheim—”Finding My Way Back”
#93
If this was 1973, this would probably be a big regional R&B hit in Baltimore or Chicago, like The Whatnauts or some of the lesser Chi-Lites singles. It’s 2010, though, and what would have been second-tier in the ’70s is just an oddity now. If Jaheim is going to mine the past, he should go all the way, like Raphael Saadiq. Or he should at least get better songs.

Rodney Atkins—”Farmer’s Daughter”
#96
Notable only for the way Atkins sings, especially the first verse. His backwoods accent is so heavily played and calculated—not a single drawl out of place—that it becomes a kind of minstrelsy; good ol’ boy whiteface, if you will.

Craig Morgan—”This Ain’t Nothin’”,
#97
You need to walk a pretty fine line to pull off country sentimentality. Do it right, the way Miranda Lambert does on “The House That Built Me” and you can produce a powerful record despite the required cliches and homilies. One bad line, though, can tip you over into bathetic camp. This song has three or four bad lines, one of them in the chorus, so it gets repeated over and over again, and another in the second verse that wouldn’t be out of place in a South Park parody.

Blake Shelton—”All About Tonight”
#98
There are two things I find interesting about Blake Shelton. One is his release schedule, where he’s experimenting with putting out half an album every few months (this is the lead single from his second “six-pack”); and the other is that he’s engaged to Miranda Lambert, who outclasses him in every way I can think of. His music doesn’t interest me at all.

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New this week—6/20/10

Monday, June 28th, 2010

Justin Bieber featuring Jaden Smith—”Never Say Never”
#33
I was expecting it to be bad, but I wasn’t expecting it to be this bad. The problem isn’t Bieber, who acquits himself as well as can be expected (it actually helps that he shows so little real emotion), and it isn’t the blandness of the song itself. It isn’t even Jaden Smith, who, despite his heritage, sounds talentless but willing to give it the old middle-school try. But his rap, if it can be called that, is terrible not only in delivery, but in spirit and in message. What it seems to be saying is that if you’re privileged enough to get a guest spot on a Justin Bieber record, then you don’t need to worry about all those people who are bigger and stronger and probably smarter than you are. Which is, of course, the exact opposite of the message presented in the movie. It would be meaningless to accuse the producers of a remake of The Karate Kid of selling-out their principles, but shouldn’t they at least know what they are, or were, once upon a time?

Glee Cast
“Faithfully”, #37
“Over the Rainbow”, #44
“Anyway You Want It/Lovin’ Touchin’ Squeezin’”, #58
“To Sir with Love”, #75
“Bohemian Rhapsody”, #84
“Don’t Stop Believin’” obviously wasn’t enough, so now the makers of Glee (sounds like they should be a division of Proctor & Gamble, doesn’t it?) have decided to revive the entire Journey catalog. If the show didn’t already deserve capital punishment, this would be enough to guarantee termination with extreme prejudice. At least it’s over for a few months. See you in September (and no, that’s not a song suggestion).

Shakira featuring Freshlyground—”Waka Waka (This Time for Africa)”
#43
As nice as it is to find some version of township jive on the American charts after 25 years, this isn’t a very good record. It was obviously done quickly and to order, Shakira doesn’t seem to put much into it, and let’s face it, township jive has run it’s course. Most of the backing here could have been sampled from The Indestructible Beat of Soweto, which was released in 1986. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but there are much fresher African—even just South African—sounds out there. But I have a feeling that for a long time to come, whenever most people think about African music—when they think about it at all, that is—this is the sort of thing they’ll hear in their head. That’s not Shakira’s fault, of course, or Soweto’s, or even Paul Simon’s. It’s a shame, nonetheless.

Christina Aguilera—”Bionic”
#66
Oddly enough, this is not one of the songs that Santigold co-wrote for Bionic the album. Which is just as well, since if she had she would only be repeating herself. It’s an old refrain, but once again I’m impressed by Aguilera’s daring in terms of inspiration and frustrated by her stiffness and oversinging. “So damn bionic” may well be the dumbest lyric of the year, and she sings it as if it were the most important thing she’s ever said.

Ne-Yo—”Beautiful Monster”
#67
There’s a wonderful tension to the verses, but the chorus is an anti-climax, musically and lyrically too simple and old fashioned to fit with the rest, danceable but forgettable. A lot of it sounds like an outtake from Michael Jackson’s Dangerous, and I like Ne-Yo enough that I’m willing to accept this as an MJ tribute and let it pass. Hope he does better next time.

Lil Jon featuring 3OH!3—”Hey”
#70
Lil Jon is no fool. In the four or five years he’s been unable to record due to legal complications, he’s kept a close eye on the obnoxious white guys who have been copping his style, and he’s more than willing to allow them to give him a little push as he gets back on the road. More than a push: 3OH!3 provide not only the hook but also the only real lyric this song possesses. The styles jar a bit, but even though the three of them have probably never been in the same room at the same time, it still works. It’s a softer, friendlier form of crunk, but Lil Jon doesn’t care. He’s seen the future, and he’s riding its coattails.

Train—”If It’s Love”
#90
Occasionally as clever as they think they are—”Flat like an Idol singer/Remember Winger?/I digress”—they’re also more cynical than their romantic tropes would suggest, and when the strings enter near the end you realize that they can pander with the best of them. Second single in a row to mention an eighties one-shot band (it was Mister Mister last time), which may well be another form of pandering. At least they’re willing to age with their audience.

OneRepublic—”Secrets”
#98
The stripped down intro reveals at least one secret—which is that all of Ryan Tedder’s songs seem to based on one of Bach’s solo cello concertos (which would explain their sophisticated yet comfortably familiar facade). The other is the dirty little secret that Tedder won’t admit even to himself: all his songs really do sound the same. Score one for Kelly Clarkson.

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New this week—6/13/10

Wednesday, June 23rd, 2010

Drake featuring Lil Wayne—”Miss Me”
#15
It’s hard to determine whether Drake is the real thing or not—or anything at all, for that matter. His inability to shake his influences and come forth as himself is a major problem—first time I listened to this I thought his rap was Wayne’s. His self-consciousness has it’s charms (though not when it’s converted into beats), but it could quickly turn into a detriment if he isn’t careful. Sounding unsure of what you’re getting yourself into isn’t exactly the best concept to build a career around. Neither is the pronouncement that “life isn’t a rehearsal” when you sound like you’re still doing warm-ups.

Taio Cruz
“Dynamite”, #26
“Dirty Picture” (featuring Ke$ha), #96
Just to ask the obvious question, shouldn’t a song called “Dynamite” sound explosive? This sure doesn’t. On the other hand, “Dirty Picture” does sound dirty. It also sounds unclean, though that may just be a matter of personal taste.

T.I.
“Got Your Back” (featuring Keri Hilson), #38
“Yeah Ya Know (Takers)”, #44
“Got Your Back” is surprisingly warm and affectionate, suggesting real love, something that T.I. has never managed, or for that matter ever really tried, before. He also seems to be breaking out of his tendency to overpack his arrangements (if there’s such a thing as baroque rap, T.I. makes it)—compared to his last few singles shows admirable restraint, it’s few lose threads tied up quite nicely by Keri Hilson. I just wish someone could have done the same for “Yah Ya Know”.

Nicki Minaj—”Your Love”
#51
With her day-glo wigs and cosplay fashion style, it’s no surprise that Minaj’s idea of romanticism comes out sounding like Sailor Moon in the hood. It’s an interesting idea, but it doesn’t quite gel, and it gets confusing. One minute she’s talking about the guy’s stacks and the next she’s dreaming about samurai and geishas who speak Thai somewhere up in the sky, and then she tops it all by turning into Supergirl. She may be on to something, but this is both too obvious and too obscure to get over.

Glee Cast
“Good Vibrations”, #69
“Another One Bites the Dust”, #79
“Tell Me Something Good”, #87
“Loser”, #93
“It’s a Man’s Man’s Man’s World”, #95
Two more white rap songs from the crew (three if you count “Loser”), and the joke, which worked on “Ice Ice Baby”, has paled considerably. The less said about “Tell Me Something Good” and “It’s a Man’s Man’s Man’s World” the better.

3Oh!3—”Deja Vu”
#75
This makes two songs from these guys I actually kind of like, but whether that means they’ve improved or my tastes have collapsed under the constant barrage of electro synths I can’t say. It’s worth noting, though, that this is the first of their songs to suggest that the party party world they inhabit is starting to bore them a little. Is that maturity or exhaustion? Who knows?

Billy Currington—”Pretty Good At Drinking Beer”
#83
Currington’s last single was an overwrought string of country cliches. This is cliche bound as well, but it’s also clever, and not overwrought at all. As an argument for being a lard-ass, it’s even charming.

Little Big Town—”Little White Church”
#94
They’ve learned enough from Miranda Lambert to be tough and honest, and enough from Sugarland to be cheerful and spunky even while laying down the law. Too bad they haven’t learned enough from either to write more than a passable lyric, though putting “not gonna have your baby” in the list of things she won’t do until he marries her is still a jolt.

VV Brown—”Shark In the Water”
#97
I’ve already expressed my admiration for Brown, who appeals to me not only for her upbeat sound but for the range of her musical references and influences. Here she steals from both Paul McCartney and Lou Reed, while making explicit the thread of near hysterical paranoia that runs through many of her songs. It’s also nice to see that, unlike most of her UK peers, she’s managed her US chart debut without depending on an American rapper to give her a commercial leg up. Here’s hoping she gets the attention she deserves.

Neon Trees—”Animal”
#100
What decade is this again?

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