Posts Tagged ‘Adele’

Sports Cars and Jesus: Hot 100 Roundup—3/9/13

Friday, March 8th, 2013

Nelly—“Hey Porsche”
#42

This is hilarious. Nelly has always experimented with mixing different genres into his-hop, but over the last few years, as his pop success has faded, he’s started to sound desperate. On “Hey Porsche” he dredges up the old idea of comparing a car to a woman (or vice-versa) mixes in some touches of EDM, tosses a “nigga” or two into the lyric to maintain his cred, and, most inexplicably, copies the riff from “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”. And after all that effort, what does he end up with? A hip-hop version of Train. Maybe he should try something else.

AfroJack featuring Chris Brown—“As Your Friend”
#88

Though it rarely gets mentioned, for obvious reasons, Chris Brown has done as much, if not more, to bring EDM into hip-hop as anybody. Whatever his other flaws, musical or personal, he knows how to pick beats. His biggest problem is that he often doesn’t know what to do with them, penning cliche lyrics around banal, or non-existent, melody lines. On “As Your Friend”, though there still isn’t much of a tune, the lyrics are better, and Brown intentionally plays down as low as he can. He also manages to avoids the defiant self-pity that makes him so easy to hate. He sounds resigned, almost repentant, which is a big change for him. As for the beat, it’s pop on the insane, dubstep side of the EDM spectrum, and far better than anything David Guetta or Calvin Harris have come up with recently. “As Your Friend” isn’t great, by any means, but it’s a step in the right direction.

Emeli Sande—“Next To Me”
#89

Those overpowering drums owe an obvious debt to Adele, but Sande takes them back to their source, the driving martial rhythms of gospel (you didn’t think “Next To Me” was about a lover, did you?). Also like Adele, Sande has the ability to get loud without ever sounding shrill or losing her emotional connection to the song; she can go places other singers wouldn’t dare. I have some doubts about the lyrics, especially the paraphrase of Kipling at the end, but a record this powerful almost defies criticism.

Eric Church—“Like Jesus Does”
#99

Church is so good at what he does that he almost pulls this off. Though I appreciate his refusal to turn this into a power-ballad, which is what 90% of country singers would have done, it gets stolid by the end, and the lack of rhythmic and melodic variety becomes wearing. His metaphors don’t always gel, either. Is a Waylon Jennings song more sinful if it’s on vinyl as opposed to CD or MP3? How would that work, exactly? Church must think it means something, because he repeats it at the end, but all I get from it is that it’s a way of establishing his country traditionalist bona fides without dragging his truck into the song. This is a good thing, but it doesn’t quite work.

Future featuring Lil Wayne—“Karate Chop (Remix)”
#100

It’s a feeling that’s been coming over me for the last couple of months, and now it’s taken an unshakable hold, no matter how I try to ignore it: I dread the idea of listening to Lil Wayne. He has become the worst part of almost every record he appears on (including his own). Here, after being provided a near-perfect lead-in by Future, he half-assedly replicates the flow Future has established, then tosses it aside like something that’s beneath him and proceeds to delivers a few bars of rote misogyny before giving up completely. He’s more than the worst thing on “Karate Chop”; he pretty much ruins it. To compound my despair, last week Kanye West called a radio station to announce that, whatever MTV may say, Wayne is the greatest MC in the game. Which only makes me fear that the two most dominant rappers of the last decade have both lost their minds.

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off

The Highway Don’t Care, But My Songs Do: Hot 100 Roundup—2/23/13

Tuesday, February 19th, 2013

Fall Out Boy—“My Songs Know What You Did In the Dark (Light Em Up)”
#26

I’ve never been a fan of Fall Out Boy. Their songs, their playing, and their ideas always seemed muddled to me, and when you combined those with their obvious ambition and self-absorption you got a lot of pretentious mess. I was glad when they decided to go on hiatus (from which I assumed they wouldn’t return), because I could only see them getting worse if they carried on. But now they’re back, and the time off has obviously been good for them, because their comeback single is focused, imaginative, and even comes close to making sense (at least to me; I’m sure it makes perfect sense to them). Naturally enough, the song is at least partially about their time off. At least, I assume that’s what the “dark” of the title partly refers to (these guys love puns and multiple meanings). The best stroke is in the title itself, the idea of a songwriter being informed of mysterious goings on (by who or in what context we’re never told) by the songs he writes. It reveals songwriting as a kind of self-telepathy along the lines of Norman Mailer’s famous statement “I don’t know what I think until I write it down” (and yes, I had no idea what the song was about until I started writing this). These guys have obviously stored up enough anger to drive their songs without a lot of fancy ideas, but it’s good to hear them thinking. It’s even better to hear that thought making it’s way into the music instead of confusing it.

Lady Antebellum—“Downtown”
#45

After the run of mediocre singles that followed the wonderful “Need You Now” (there were seven of them, in case you’re counting), I figured Lady Antebellum for one of those groups who have one great song in them, and then repeat the formula for as long as it takes for the magic to wear off and they disappear from view. But “Downtown” is a surprise in every way, a slice of stripped-down country funk that’s the polar opposite of “Need You Now” and just about everything else in mainstream country. It does have one predecessor: “Pontoon”, and I would be surprised if Little Big Town’s hit wasn’t a strong influence on this one. “Downtown” isn’t as sultry, but it’s funkier, and if the song and arrangement aren’t enough of a surprise, the guitar break sure is. The first great country single of the year, and it’s going to be a hard one to top.

Rihanna featuring Mikky Ekko—“Stay”
#57

Adele having opened the door with “Someone Like You”, we’re starting to see a rise in piano-only (or near-piano-only in this case) ballads. Bruno Mars has one (and a good one, too) in the top ten, and now there’s “Stay”. I was impressed at first: the song moves nicely and shifts in ways that keep your attention, and Rihanna’s voice is looser and comes closer to real emotion than she ever has before. But then you have to deal with Mikky Ekko (ugh, what a name), and his “Ed Sheeran wasn’t available so they sent me” vocal. Ekko gets the entire second verse to himself and sinks the record. At at her most mechanistic, at least Rihanna has a voice that keeps your attention. Ekko couldn’t get you to notice him even if he was singing to you in an elevator—you’d mistake him for muzak. There are a lot of guest vocals and raps on Unapologetic, along with dance tracks with not much in the way of lyrics. This is Rihanna’s way, I suppose, of giving herself a break while making sure she doesn’t drop out of public view for more than 25 minutes. I don’t blame her, but if she’s going to do that she needs to find better singers.

Tim McGraw & Taylor Swift—“Highway Don’t Care”
#59

Tim McGraw may be the most overrated country star of the last fifteen years. He’s got a voice, but he uses it for nothing but the usual country sentiment. He’s willing to experiment with sounds and styles, but he always lands in roughly the same place, and those experiments never extend to the ideas or the themes of the songs themselves. He generates a lot of buzz at times, but no heat. On “Highway Don’t Care” he teams up with Taylor Swift, who has already done her part to canonize him, and though neither one of them had a hand in writing the song, it may as well have both their fingerprints on it. Which means it leads nowhere new. Even worse, it takes its sweet time not getting there. The only revelation comes when Swift takes the part of the generic love song playing on the radio: if ever there was proof that it’s her voice as well as her songwriting talents that have made her such a star, this is it. She makes those banal words come alive. Too bad McGraw can’t do the same.

Drake—“Started From the Bottom”
#63

“Started From the Bottom” is more a teaser for the new album than a legitimate single, but I’m impressed by the beat, and by Drake’s switching up of voices. Whatever you may think of him overall, there’s no doubt that he’s improved as a rapper. As for the lyrics, I assume that he means that he and his crew started out from the bottom of the rap game, not life itself. I’m willing to concede that point; how many people would take any teen actor—especially a Canadian one—seriously if he suddenly announced he intended to become a serious rapper? But that doesn’t mean he needs to devote every track to complaining about it.

Kenney Chesney—“Pirate Flag”
#68

Chesney is coming off a string of above-average singles, but this is the fourth single off Welcome To the Fishbowl, and the inspiration doesn’t run quite as deep this time around. Certainly not deep enough to float his pirate ship.

Young Jeezy featuring 2 Chainz—“R.I.P.”
#69

Is he talking about his career? Not yet, I guess.

Chris Young—“I Can Take It From There”
#97

For assembly-line made country slap and tickle, not bad. But I’d have less doubt about his lust if Young didn’t use so many pre-formed parts to put it across.

Wale featuring Tiara Thomas—“Bad”
#99

This is the first time a Wale record has gotten my attention since he teamed up with Lady Gaga on “Chillin’” nearly four years ago. Once again it’s the woman who makes the track worth hearing. When Tiara Thomas announces that she’s never made love but she sure knows how to fuck, the record is essentially over, at least as far as Wale is concerned. Who pays attention to anything else after that? Thomas also outs herself as a cheater who’s guaranteed to break Wale’s heart, which I guess makes her whatever definition of the recently controversial term “bad bitch” you care to apply. The word “bad” applies to Wale, too, but in only one way that I can think of.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off

A Week of Near Misses
Hot 100 Roundup—10/19/12

Wednesday, October 17th, 2012

One Direction—“Live While We’re Young”
#3

I have nothing against party music or teen lust, and I could even forgive the Clash rip-off of the intro, but this is crass and insulting. “Let’s get some” is not something you say to a sexual partner, even a one-night-stand, it’s something you say to your brain-dead buddies when you go out looking for sex. Since finding willing partners is no longer a problem for these guys, it may not seem to matter to them what they say, but in reality it matters more. Either they don’t understand that, or they don’t give a shit. Plus, they didn’t give The Clash credit for that intro, so fuck ‘em.

Taylor Swift—“Red”
#6

Taylor Swift loves words. She loves the way they flow and mesh and swerve and can double up meaning and emotion with the slightest change in emphasis. She loves them so much she overstocked “Red” with them and then felt she had to come up with an arrangement to match. Her willingness to experiment is appreciated, but this goes too far. And not all the words work: the Maserati reference is wrong for her, and some of the similes fall flat. Still, I wish half the songwriters in America tried this hard.

Adele—“Skyfall”
#8

Not only the best Bond theme since Paul McCartney’s “Live and Let Die”, but the best thing Adele has ever done as well. The lushness of the string arrangement is perfect for her, allowing her voice to cut through like a knife, and a vast improvement on the harsh sound of her previous records. Not having to fight with the arrangement let’s her focus on the emotion of the song in a way she hasn’t in the past, and gives her a chance to be subtle instead of pounding the listener over the head with the power of her voice. The song itself is something of a pastiche, especially the arrangement, but it’s a great sound, and if it encourages Adele to sing like this I’m all for it.

Bruno Mars—“Locked Out of Heaven”
#34

I actively enjoy a lot of Mars’s music, and the fact that he has a working knowledge of the entire history of rock and roll only makes me like him more. That knowledge hasn’t yet synthesized into a personal style, though, so when he decides, as in this case, to base a song on the early days of The Police, all he comes up with is pastiche. It’s alright to wear your influences on your sleeve, but if you don’t rise above them you end up looking like a hack.

Brad Paisley—“Southern Comfort Zone”
#73

Paisley walks a very fine line on “Southern Comfort Zone”, which is easily his best single since “American Saturday Night”. Like that song, this is about expanding the horizon of country music, admitting, and even enjoying, the existence of a world outside the rural stereotypes that dominate the genre. The deepest moment comes at the end of the second verse, when Paisley says that he knows what it’s like to be in the minority. It’s a plea not just for a broadening of outlook beyond the south, but for greater tolerance at home as well. He’s careful, though, to soften the message as much as possible, layering spoken bits from The Andy Griffith Show, Nascar, and The Grand Old Opry over the intro and the outro, emphasizing that he always wants to come back home, and assuring his fans that a life outside the south doesn’t automatically lead to debauchery, since the only “west coast girl” he’s kissing is his wife. I have my doubts about the choir singing “Dixie”, though. It’s a musical triumph, especially when it’s paired with his guitar solo, and for Paisley it’s obviously the ultimate form of southern pride, but to a lot of people, including me, it’s also a symbol of the Confederacy and the antebellum south. Paisley has already declared his hatred of racism, and it may only be a sign of my own narrow point of view that I’m bothered by this, but I worry that Paisley thinks he’s living in a post-racist world where southern pride has been safely cleansed of the memory of slavery. I wish he was right, but he isn’t. Still, Nashville needs more songwriters who love the tradition but also question its flaws and weaknesses. I only hope that Paisley’s influence will be as powerful as his music.

Kid Cudi featuring King Chip—“Just What I Am”
#74

A hymn to self-delusion, this may be as deep as a pro-marijuana song can ever get. While dope rappers like Wiz Khalifa are just having fun, Cudi is self-medicating, hoping to alleviate the mental issues that his therapists and prescription medication don’t. Whether that’s because they can’t work or Cudi lacks the patience to let them is open to question. His defiant tone suggests the latter. Whatever the case, Cudi sounds more focused and on top of things than in the past, as if his anger at his situation had cleared away some of his confusion. If he is self-medicating, though, I wouldn’t count on it to last.

Gary Allan—“Every Storm (Runs Out of Rain)”
#78

If you’d written a song encouraging someone to start over again after a bad breakup, and filled it with images of storms lifting and new beginnings, would you base the arrangement on an earlier song that embraces death? Neither would I. Then again, after 35 years of being inured to it on oldies radio, most people have probably forgotten what “Don’t Fear the Reaper” is about, and those chord changes are a perfect fit with the Allan’s storm metaphors. So, hell, why not? Most people won’t even notice the disconnect, but whenever Allan sings about standing on the edge and setting yourself free over those doom-laden chord changes, all I hear is an invitation to suicide. And I can’t help but wonder if that message isn’t being conveyed even to those who aren’t familiar with Blue Oyster Cult. The music has it’s influence, after all, regardless of the lyrics. Not that I’m expecting a wave of suicides below the Mason-Dixon line if this becomes a hit, but a surge in depression statistics wouldn’t surprise me.

Glee Cast—“The Scientist”
#91

Mumford & Sons—“Lover Of the Light”
#97

Another muddle of personal relationship and religion, and though Mumford sounds like he knows what he’s singing about, I doubt if anybody else does. That includes the band, who go through their regular soft/loud, stop/start business regardless. The instrumental break may be the most vacant thing they’ve ever produced.

DJ Drama, 2 Chainz, Meek Mill, Jeremih—“My Moment”
#99

A better than average rap uplift song, but the arrangement is too busy and the meaning, such as there is, gets lost. I’m still trying to determine whether Drama’s shout at the end is intended as a parody of DJ Khaled or just a following along. I hope it’s the former; Drama’s too talented to waste on Khaled’s brand of nonsense.

Randy Houser—“How Country Feels”
#100

This is as ordinary as country-rock gets, but at least Houser has the good taste not to stress the double entendre of the title. Then again, maybe that’s why this is so ordinary.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off

A Fistful of Mumfords
Hot 100 Roundup—10/12/12

Thursday, October 4th, 2012

A week of big names, with three new records debuting in the top 20. A great Taylor Swift (the third in a month, with more coming each week up to the release of the album on the 22nd, when I expect all the remaining tracks to appear on the chart—she’s done it before), disappointing Ke$ha, mediocre Rihanna, Flo Rida, Pitbull channeling Toots and the Maytals, and more Mumford’s than you can shake a banjo at. Next week promises more of the same: Swift again, Bruno Mars, One Direction, Kid Cudi, Brad Paisley, Gary Allan, and, oh yeah, Adele.

Taylor Swift—“Begin Again”
#7

For the first of the preview singles leading up to the release of Red (the second, the title song, is already out), Swift takes a conservative turn, falling back on the soaring romanticism she’s famous for, with carefully placed steel guitar to keep her country audience happy. But this commercial calculation doesn’t take anything away from “Begin Again” or keep it from being one the best records she’s made. If there’s another songwriter at the moment who’s capable of capturing small romantic moments with as much skill and grace as Swift, I haven’t heard them. The verses set the stage, and the middle-eight is a delight, but it’s the chorus, which may be the best thing Swift has yet written, that makes this a great record. I only have one question: when Swift wrote the song’s best line, “I’ve been spending the last eight months/thinking all love ever does/is break, and burn, and end” did she realize she was echoing the 18th century English poet John Donne’s Holy Sonnet XIV (“That I may rise, and stand, o’erthrow me, and bend/Your force to break, blow, burn, and make me new.”)? I wouldn’t put it past her.

Ke$ha—“Die Young”
#13

In pop music, professionalism is essential, but it’s also a curse. “Die Young” is intelligent and professionally crafted, but it contains the merest whiff of inspiration. There are a few good moments, but overall it’s the dullest record Ke$ha has ever made. Considering the stuff that Ke$ha put out since her last album–the Dylan cover (terrible, but never boring), the collaboration with The Flaming Lips–”Die Young” is a surprising disappointment. Sounds like she was trying too hard.

Rihanna—“Diamonds”
#16

Written by Sia, produced by Stargate, and with a weird, Robyn-inspired vocal on the intro that has been noted by many, so much so that I’m beginning to think of all the attention paid to the Scandinavian influence on “Diamonds” as cover for the mediocrity of the rest of the track. Structurally “Diamonds” sounds odd and disconnected, and yet the arrangement is ordinary and, compared to what Rihanna has been doing the last couple of years, conservative. Considering she had just released a remix of “Cockiness”, it seems strange to issue a new single so quickly. But then, “Cockiness” was received with a yawn, so maybe this was a rush job to save face.

Mumford & Sons
“Babel”, #60
“Lover’s Eyes”, #85
“Whispers In the Dark”, #86
“Holland Road”, #92
“Ghosts That We Knew”, #94

In musical terms Mumford & Sons have improved since their first album. The arrangements are straightforward and less cluttered, the lyrics more pointed and less confused. They’ve still got a long way to go, though. Since they don’t possess much of a melodic gift and lack rhythmic variety, they fall back on gimmicks to get their point across: sudden stops and starts, dynamic shifts, and lurches in tempo are the only real tools they possess. They tend to use the same tricks, to the same effect, over and over again, often within a single song. It’s tiresome, but their unerring precision keeps the tracks moving even when there’s not much else going on.

What is going on, most of the time, is rage. I wish I could tell you what their anger is about or directed towards, but the lyrics are vague and fall too readily into cliche, making it difficult to get a clear picture. Biblical imagery suits them, but it doesn’t clarify their ideas. That may be a good thing, since many of these songs revolve around the perfidy of women, or one woman anyway. It’s possible the lyrics are about something else–society in general, or the church–and the feminine pronoun is a way of personalizing the imagery. But that only makes it worse. If Mumford is striking back against a real woman who did him wrong, his imagery would be acceptable, but not if it’s intended as allegory. The world has endured enough Bible-based misogyny. The last place we need it is in pop music, which has too much of its own misogyny already.

Flo Rida—“I Cry”
#81

The serious subject matter of “I Cry”–the mass murder in Norway, the death of a sister–explains the lack of a new hook from this hook machine, but it doesn’t explain the usual club-banging arrangement. Talking about tears falling into a champagne bucket doesn’t elicit much sympathy, either. In most cases, when a pop star who’s traded in party music releases a “serious” record, it’s a sign their days on top are coming to an end. Next stop: a greatest hits album with a couple of new tracks. Should be a good one.

Pitbull featuring TJR—“Don’t Stop the Party”
#89

Another insane track from Pitbull, and a perfect example of a sample chain. Having heard TJR’s funk/house track, “Funky Vodka”, Pitbull brought the producer into the studio, and re-edited and remixed the track with his vocals over the top. Like so many dance records, “Funky Vodka” itself was based on a sample: Toots and the Maytals’s “Funky Kingston”. So if you want, you can credit Toots Hibbert with writing the riff that makes the song move, though he no doubt borrowed it from someone else. Whatever the case, Pitbull’s version isn’t a desecration: all he does is up the party atmosphere and modernize the sound. He also delivers one of the best lines I’ve ever heard from him, mixing his usual bragging with a healthy dose of Latino pride: “Just cause you ain’t me, don’t hate me/As a matter fact you should thank me/Even if you don’t, you’re welcome, yankees”.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off

A British Invasion?

Friday, February 3rd, 2012

This is old news, but I felt a need to comment on the piece Billboard ran on The Wanted a couple of weeks back. I have no doubt that The Wanted are a real story; their single (which I’ll get around to reviewing soon), is moving quickly up the charts, and the reaction from the (carefully planted) crowd on the clip from Ellen below suggests that they could be as big as Billboard claims they’ll be.

But calling it the start of a new British Invasion can only be done if you ignore all the other British acts that have been washing up on the charts the last two or three years. At Billboard, apparently, a true invasion can only involve cute white boys. If you’re female, like Adele, whose teenage fans are far more dedicated than The Wanted’s will ever be, or if you’re black, like Taio Cruz, whose sound The Wanted blatantly draw from, you don’t count. Hell, even prog rockers like Coldplay and Muse don’t count. Those four, along with Amy Winehouse, Estelle, Jay Sean, Natasha Bedingfield, Florence + The Machine, even Jessie J (whose single, “Domino”, is inexplicably number 8 on the Hot 100 this week), were apparently nothing but scouting parties, drawing fire and preparing the beaches for the troops who really count. Go get ‘em, boys.

video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in pop culture, singles, video | Comments Off

Hot 100 Roundup—8/13/11

Thursday, August 25th, 2011

Kreayshawn—”Gucci Gucci”
#82
Normally I would applaud a catchy record that satirizes status seeking, and especially hip-hop’s fascination with high-fashion brands. The problem is that Kreayshawn’s targets aren’t rich rappers, they’re the poor who are taken in and taken advantage of by the rap world’s tireless product placement. In other words, she’s a snob whose putdown of “basic bitches” is as heartless as the comments on the poor you hear at Tea Party rallies. Maybe she should get a gig on Fox News.

Rascal Flatts featuring Natasha Bedingfield—”Easy”
#87
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 7/30/11

Rihanna—”Cheers (Drink To That)”
#91
It’s unfair to make career judgments about an artist based on the sixth single off an album that’s been out for nearly a year, but it’s hard not to wonder what’s going on. This isn’t Rihanna’s worst single; that would be her previous record, “Man Down”. It may even be better than the record before that, “California King Bed”. But it still makes three stinkers in a row. I’m glad she’s getting a break after an intense two years, but pumping out one sub-par record after another isn’t buying time, it’s killing her career. Better to disappear for a year and come back refreshed. Records like this just make things worse.

The Black Eyed Peas—”Don’t Stop the Party”
#93
Shifting into cruise control is one way to keep the party going, I suppose, but this is the sound of a band that’s learned all the tricks and can apply them in their sleep. It’s not terrible, though; it isn’t even embarrassing. Which is another way of saying it doesn’t show much energy or inspiration. And without energy and inspiration these guys barely exist. No wonder they’re going on hiatus.

Adele—”Rumour Has It”
#96
This is the first Adele record I’ve heard that comes close to justifying the praise she’s been receiving, but all it says to me is that she can be good, not that she’s the savior of “authentic” pop music. It helps that this is pure girl-group, and that she’s more interested in delivering a sonic wallop than in baring her soul. In fact, the soul-baring bit in the middle eight is the worst part of the song. Like most people, she’s better at putting on an act than being “authentic”. As she gets older maybe she’ll own up to it.

Craig Campbell—”Fish”
#97
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 7/30/11

Matt Nathanson—”Faster”
#99
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 7/9/11

Jerrod Nieman—”One More Drinkin’ Song”
#100
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 7/23/11

Tags: , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off

Hot 100 Roundup—5/7/11

Monday, May 16th, 2011

Luke Bryan—”Country Girl (Shake It For Me)”
#22
The intro, especially that throbbing guitar line, shakes pretty well, but after that it’s all by rote. If Bryan actually demonstrated some honest lust, his sexism might be forgivable, but instead he goes on automatic and gets progressively duller.

Beyonce—”Run the World (Girls)”
#33
Based on a Major Lazer sample (aka Diplo and Switch), this is essentially an M.I.A. track with all the third-world references and atmosphere removed, and that loss of texture makes a huge difference. The bare bones sound is as bald and uninteresting as Beyonce’s well-meant lecture on sexual politics. Since this song makes explicit what has been implicit in almost every record she’s made as a solo artist, I assume Beyonce is either running out of patience or running out of ideas, probably both. Either way she’s beating us over the head with a message that was more powerful when it was partially hidden and presented in dramatic terms. “Irreplaceable” is a far greater feminist work than this preachy bore.

Adele—”Turning Tables”
#63
This woman knows how to sing (though not this time), but she doesn’t know how to write a song (or arrange one). When the strings come in you realize her real stock in trade is melodrama, not emotion.

Glee Cast
“Turning Tables” (featuring Gwyneth Paltrow), #66
“All By Myself”, #87

Bridget Mendler
“Breakthrough”, #88
“Somebody”, #89
Two more songs from the Lemonade Mouth soundtrack, and though neither is as good as “Determinate” (which is quickly turning into my favorite pop song of the year), both are far better than one would expect from Disney. It would be easy to say that this is simply Disney doing a better job of keeping up with pop trends than they have in the past, but the fact is that in the last few years it’s pop that has been moving closer to Disney rather than the opposite. Now that Glee has taken over the High School Musical audience (who are, after all, five years older) and Nickelodeon is chasing the latest tweeners, Disney moves on to high school pop-rock, tracking close behind Kelly Clarkson, Katy Perry, and Avril Lavigne, and downplaying the showtune cheeriness that spoiled so much of their earlier music. It’s still derivative as hell, but it’s also right on track with the times. And catchy. Don’t forget catchy.

Jennifer Lopez—”Papi”
#99
Though there’s nothing to indicate it on the credits, this sounds like something Lady GaGa may have cooked up for a b-side and then decided to give away instead. With GaGa singing, this might stand a chance to be both sexy and defiant. Lopez, instead, sounds cheerfully submissive to her man—which is her idea of being sexy—and invites every other woman in the world to join her in her self-degradation. She should ask Luke Bryan to appear in the video—he’d feel right at home.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off

Hot 100 Roundup—3/12/11

Monday, March 7th, 2011

Jennifer Lopez featuring Pitbull—”On the Floor”
#9
Anyone with any sense knows why this debuted in the top ten. Lopez’s presence on American Idol may, in fact, be the only reason this record was made at all. Some people have already mentioned the irony involved in Lopez coaching singers when she doesn’t have much of a voice herself, but weak vocals are the least of this record’s problems, which is such a blatant grab-bag of current dance floor trends that even Pitbull sounds a little unsure of it. You can’t say Lopez and her producer, RedOne, aren’t up-to-date, but ripping off a track as recognizable as “Stereo Love” when it’s just peaked on the charts is about as daring as this record gets. For anyone who may have wondered whether it was RedOne or Lady Gaga who provided the creative firepower on The Fame, this should answer your questions quite nicely.

Glee Cast
“Don’t You Want Me”, #49
“Blame It (On the Alcohol)”, #55
“Tik Tok”, #61
Back to normal.

Wiz Khalifa featuring Too $hort—”On My Level”
#52
Not a terrible track, but the presence of Too $hort makes me question Khalifa’s judgement. Too $hort is now too old to indulge in stimulants himself, so instead he talks about getting girls loaded so he can have his way with them. What a guy. Is this why some people are raving about Khalifa? Because he’s bringing back “real”, stupidly sexist hip-hop? As if it ever went away.

Adele
“Someone Like You”, #65
“Set Fire To the Rain”, #88
Adele has a voice—when she isn’t blasting like an air raid siren she manages to be both growly and vulnerable, with a touch of hysteria thrown in for good measure—but these are terrible songs, if they can even be graced with the designation of song at all. They’re set pieces for her voice; the lyrical blather serves as nothing but an indicator of what she’s getting so upset about. She’s young yet, so maybe she’ll learn, and when she gets around to making 35 she may even have something to say. But since her sales are encouraging her in the wrong direction, I don’t hold out much hope.

Big Time Rush featuring Snoop Dogg—”Boyfriend”
#79
Snoop teaming up with this Nickelodeon-sponsored boy band has a lot of people shaking their heads, but other than their choice of words and their preferred stimulants (Big Time Rush are high on life, you see), I don’t see much difference. Both have fairly shallow ideas about love and romance, one the result of inexperience, the other the result of too much experience. Snoop, of course, is super cool while BTR gush, but while BTR sees nothing but the stars in their own eyes, Snoop sees nothing but Gucci bags and the size of her thighs. Since they’re both looking for the wrong things, why shouldn’t they search together?

Mike Posner featuring Lil Wayne—”Bow Chicka Wow Wow”
#82
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 2/28/11

DJ Khaled featuring Rick Ross, Plies, Lil Wayne & T-Pain—”Welcome To My Hood”
#90
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 2/28/11

Kirk Franklin—”I Smile”
#97
I’d never heard of Franklin before this, and since he doesn’t actually sing on this track, I thought he was some sort of Prosperity Gospel preacher. But he has a long history on the gospel circuit and seems to be the real thing, though you’d never know it by listening to this happy jingle for Jesus. Not that it blatantly advertises itself as such: for the most part it’s a positivity anthem with a few religious references thrown in. It’s essentially all chorus, and though it seems friendly enough at first, it gets cloying fast, and then it goes on and on and doesn’t leave you alone, like a cheerful bus stop proselytizer who doesn’t recognize the fine line between being friendly and being an irritant. Franklin actually starts out irritating by dedicating the song to “depression, recession, and unemployment”, no doubt for opening desperate people’s hearts to the message of the church. Which is one of the reasons I, and many others, hate the church to begin with.

Joe Nichols—”The Shape I’m In”
#98
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 2/21/11

Aaron Lewis featuring George Jones & Charlie Daniels—”Country Boy”
#100
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 2/21/11

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off

Hot 100 Roundup 12/19/10

Sunday, December 26th, 2010

T.I. featuring Eminem—”That’s All She Wrote”
#18
No matter how much he brags, the events of the last couple of years have worn the sharp edges off of T.I. Even when he’s trying to be threatening he sounds ruminative, as if he’s thinking out the safest way to kick your ass. He’s gained maturity, maybe even some wisdom, but he isn’t sure what to do with it. Eminem meanwhile, clean and sober but with a voice that makes him sound permanently pissed, throws maturity out the window. His rap is seriously insane—no, you can’t have any of his fritos; yes, A&W hot dogs are the best—and all of it is apparently addressed to Sarah Palin. While T.I. is back in jail, pondering, Eminem is a free man getting his roar back.

Glee Cast
“Baby, It’s Cold Outside”, #57
“Welcome Christmas”, #59

Adele—”Rolling In the Deep”
#68
Adele has a voice, but she takes too much pleasure in showing it off, and doesn’t understand that to really show it off she needs strong songs. This is not a strong song; it’s barely a song at all.

Chris Brown—”No Bullshit”
#89
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/12/10

Dev & The Cataracs—”Bass Down Low”
#94
As if to prove my theory of last week regarding Far*East Movement’s dependence on their guests, here come Dev & The Cataracs with a record that’s essentially a remake of “Like a G6″. Dev is a real find, Ke$ha with added hip-hop cool (if she’s drunk you’d never know it), Fergie without pretensions to diva-hood. The music is Black Eyed Peas without the minimalist/intellectual gloss, more street and more club at the same time. Who knows how many of these they have in them, so grab it while you can.

Jamie Foxx—”Fall For Your Type”
#95
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/12/10

Bubbling Under:

Taio Cruz—”Higher”
There are far worse things than mindless dance music, and in this particular genre I’m starting to like Cruz more than Flo Rida, whose gift for hooks is starting to fade. Cruz’s gift for hooks is just warming up, and I’m impressed by his voice: he hits notes that would be in the falsetto range for anyone else with no apparent strain (and though it may just be the suggestiveness of the title, there are times when this really does remind me of Jackie Wilson). The arrangement is busy, but even that makes a certain sense: the pressurized feeling of dancehall transferred to hip-hop influenced disco. As music for listening, it’s too simple, but for dancing it’s perfect.

Mariah Carey—”Oh Santa!”
Overstuffed with Christmas cheer as it may be, this is so silly and charming and energetic that it can be forgiven the overkill. Carey is trying too hard, but somehow it all works: cheerleader chants, soul choruses, lyrics that are both artless and endearing (“I know you’re really busy with your elves right now”), it’s got everything. Best of all, when Carey lets loose with her whacked-out theremin impersonation, she plays it for a joke. It’s the final touch of icing on a cake already covered with sugar balls, glitter, and tinsel. Merry Christmas.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Hot 100, Hot 100 Roundup, new this week, singles | Comments Off