The Illiterate

Lil Wayne Featuring Cory Gunz—”6 Foot 7 Foot”
#9
The background provided by Bangladesh is so stupid—and not in a good way—that it almost ruins the record for me. Wayne himself saves it. His gnomic notes to himself—you can almost see him obsessively scrawling them out in his cell—are so full of twists and turns and puns, words and phrases pulled inside out and examined to reveal newer if not always deeper meanings, that even if he isn’t saying much he seems to say it all. Writing down his raps has tightened and intensified his language, revealing more about his character than any of his free-form, off-the-cuff displays, brilliant as they were, ever did. Turns out he’s something of a grammarian, though that should have been obvious a long time ago.

Taio Cruz featuring Travie McCoy—”Higher”
#80
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/19/10

Nicki Minaj featuring Drake—”Moment 4 Life”
#82
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/5/10

P!nk—”Fuckin’ Perfect”
#86
“Fuck” being the word of the moment (word of the year, really), P!nk, with her usual commercial intuitiveness, tosses it into the title of a song in which the word itself doesn’t appear. I wish it did; it might liven up this otherwise bathetic self-empowerment ballad.

Jerrod Niemann—”What Do You Want”
#90
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/12/10

Thompson Square—”Are You Gonna Kiss Me Or Not”
#92
Sugarland as Bon Jovi, just what we’ve been waiting for.

R. Kelly—”When A Woman Loves”
#93
I loved the video for this when it came out a few months ago, but I guess this is just another example of a mediocre record being lifted by it’s accompanying visuals (this is why I don’t watch Glee; I don’t want its horrible music tainted by theatrical quality). What looks loving and soulful in the video turns out to be stiff and lifeless when heard on its own. Kelly isn’t that great a singer, and his soul inflections sound calculated and more often verge toward homage, and even parody, rather than actual emotion. His “Thank you” at the end, which works in the video, sounds like a dumb, knowing wink on the record, as if the whole thing was nothing but a stylistic game.

Fabolous—”You Be Killin’ ‘Em”
#94
Though this eventually turns into one of the most sexist pop songs I’ve heard in some time (“She looks like the best money I ever spent” Fabolous says of his latest acquisition), what really sums it up for me comes in the first 30 seconds. After a brief intro establishes the electric piano riff that drives the song, Fabolous steps up to the mike, and by way of introduction, says “Niiiice”. The first thought that came into my head: “Isn’t it a little late in the day for a Vanilla Ice parody?” Second thought: “This isn’t a parody.”

The Script—”For the First Time”
#97
At first I was willing to give them points for writing about something truly meaningful: the stress economic hard times places on relationships. A lot of songs have been written about that, though (I’m sure there are a couple of hundred songwriters in Nashville working on it right now), and The Script’s tin ear for detail and sentimental musicality guarantees that this is nothing but a sop to those who feel they need a good sorrowful wallow every once in a while to get by. Every human emotion has its exploiter; self-pity, meet The Script.

Mariah Carey—”Oh Santa!”
#100
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/19/10