Posts Tagged ‘Jason DeRulo’

Luckier and Luckier: Hot 100 Roundup—5/4/13

Thursday, May 9th, 2013

Daft Punk featuring Pharrell Williams—“Get Lucky”
#19

Good music is its own justification, and “Get Lucky” is OK, but I still find myself questioning its necessity. It’s more of a museum piece than a pop record, a careful reconstruction and distillation of everything that made disco enjoyable with all the rough edges that made it vital removed. Though I can’t exactly explain what I mean by this, to me it sounds very French. Or like smooth jazz with a beat. Even Nile Rodgers’s guitar sounds generic. And its debut in the top twenty seems like the last gasp of a movement that lost its energy long ago.

will.i.am featuring Miley Cyrus—“Fall Down”
#58

How did I miss the fact that what will.i.am really wants to be isn’t a pop star, or even a pop empresario, but the Brian Wilson of EDM? The big influence here isn’t some piece of European minimalist disco, but Beach Boys’ records like “Good Vibrations” or Smile. Maybe I’m only realizing it now because this is the first time one of his musical collages hasn’t sounded like a cut-and-paste job designed to save a batch of disconnected ideas. Or maybe the strings tipped me off. There’s a big difference between will.i.am and Wilson, though (besides the fact that Wilson didn’t have to hire out the singing): Wilson didn’t just slap together stray parts, he thought out great parts and then meshed them into something more. Great as the combinations were, as Smiley Smile proved, even the oddest fragments could be separated from the body of the piece and still be enjoyable. The various parts of this record are improved by being heard in conjunction with the others, but not by much, and they could never stand on their own. Also, Wilson got decent lyricists to write his words for him, words that added to the music, rather than limply decorating it. This is an unfair comparison, I know, but will.i.am invites it, because his ambitions are that big, even though his talent is much smaller.

Jason Derulo—“The Other Side”
#75

A hopeless rehash of Usher’s “DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love” hampered by the brash mindlessness of the beat and the simple fact that DeRulo can’t sing. And I don’t mean as well as Usher. I mean he can’t sing.

Calvin Harris featuring Ellie Goulding—“I Need Your Love”
#76

Who needs hooks when you have Ellie Goulding’s voice to work with? Baby-doll innocent one moment, Bjorkishly weird the next, breathy and sincere in between, she constantly creates tiny, micro-pitched melodies between the usual notes that are either pleasurable or irritating depending on your point of view, but captivating either way. Harris, pro that he is, throws in some hooks of his own, just for spice, and the result is the best record from him I’ve heard.

Miguel—“How Many Drinks”
#88

This seems cold and callous at first, and it is, but it’s also respectful in its own single-minded way. Miguel is more than willing to play the game, he just wants to know what the results will be beforehand. Of course, he’s also betting that telling the truth and self-serving candor will work as a seduction technique. If I were his chosen companion, he’d probably have me at the end of the first verse, when he rhymes “get in your pants” with “am I going too fast?” But that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want to hear the rest of his line.

Robin Thicke featuring T.I. & Pharrell—“Blurred Lines”
#94

This is so perfectly realized that I keep thinking there must be something seriously wrong with it, but aside from a certain level of slick calculation and the usual mild sexism, I can’t find anything. Thicke and Pharrell’s voices blend so perfectly that half the time I can’t tell them apart, and the record is so beautifully constructed that it doesn’t make any difference anyway. The high-point, though, is T.I., who first nails the beat and then toys with it like a master. It’s his best rap in years.

Sean Kingston featuring Chris Brown & Wiz Khalifa—“Beat It”
#98

Kingston is a one-shot artist who’s career was fading long before his accident, so though I respect this attempted comeback, I don’t see much chance of success, and certainly not with material as generic as this. Meanwhile, Chris Brown continues to be trapped, or to flaunt, sexual metaphors that remind us of the darkest moments of his past. He won’t just “Beat It” for you, girl, he’ll “beat it up”. Is he that callous, or that oblivious? Is there a difference? Does it even matter anymore?

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Only Sleeping
Hot 100 Roundup—6/9/12

Tuesday, June 5th, 2012

Phillip Phillips
“Home”, #10
“We’ve Got Tonight”, #97
Though it’s nice that American Idol has decided to go with something besides a third-rate Diane Warren imitation for its winner’s first single, a second-rate Mumford and Sons imitation is not an improvement. In fact it’s almost the same thing.

Katy Perry—“Wide Awake”
#35
This starts well, with a surprisingly subdued opening, but soon the bombast sets in, and you’re left to marvel once again at the willingness of pop stars to commercialize their personal lives. The only thing worthy of note is the way Perry uses clichéd biblical images —should a former Christian singer really be tossing off a phrase like “born again” with such apparent disregard for its deeper meaning? And didn’t anyone involved in this figure out that Perry singing the title phrase like an android wouldn’t convince anyone that she was even conscious, much less wide awake?

Lupe Fiasco—“Around My Way (Freedom Ain’t Free)”
#76
Though I understand the beef regarding the “They Reminisce Over You” sample, that’s hardly the most embarrassing thing about this record. That would be the lyric, a “We Didn’t Start the Fire”-style laundry list of celebrity-endorsed liberal causes. Fiasco’s flow is impressive, but his choice of metaphors is staggeringly off base. “Two croissants short of a continental breakfast”? Not exactly the voice of the masses, is it?

Chris Brown—“Don’t Wake Me Up”
#89
Brown sounds as self-satisfied as ever, and, just like Diddy, he even hires a female vocalist to provide a few loving words to him on the intro. This time, though, the music doesn’t save him: the beat provided the Benassis is such a mess you wonder why Brown thought he could make a decent record out of it. But when your ego is that big, you’re bound to fall into it sooner or later.

Jason DeRulo—“Undefeated”
#90
It’s not often that someone makes a comeback after breaking their neck, and I congratulate DeRulo on his recovery. If you listen closely enough, you can hear his joy in being able to make this record at all. But DeRulo remains a minor talent, and this is a very minor song. I like the clean quality of the sound, but it doesn’t go anywhere.

Rita Ora—“How We Do (Party)”
#96
Wait a minute. England is sending us yet another version of Jessie J? Isn’t there some import law we could invoke against this?

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Hot 100 Roundup—10/15/11

Thursday, October 27th, 2011

B.o.B. featuring Lil Wayne—”Strange Clouds”
#7
B.o.B. has been putting so much energy into the pop side of his career that I’d swear this is the first time I’ve heard him rap. That can’t be true, but that’s the way it feels. He isn’t bad—good flow, some nice twists and turns both in the rhythm and the words—though more derivative of T.I. than I’d expect him to be. Wayne, meanwhile, sounds more alive all the time. His rap feels like it came off the top of his head for once, and while it isn’t brilliant, he seems to be regathering his strengths. Not a moment too soon, either.

Bruno Mars—”It Will Rain”
#28
Somewhere under the overkill of fuzzy synths and staggered beats you’ll find a very good song with sharp lyrics and a distinct Motown feel. I’d love to hear a slightly more uptempo, sparsely arranged version. In the meantime, we’ll just need to listen past an arrangement dictated more by it’s place on the latest Twilight soundtrack than the song itself.

Nickelback—”When We Stand Together”
#48
Of course it’s awful, it’s Nickelback. But consider this for a moment: these guys are so slow at what they do—their new album will be only their third since 2003—that this song must have been written long before the Occupy protests or maybe even the Arab Spring. Yet here it is, right on time. Putting its laughable aesthetics aside, it’s exactly what it should be for this moment in time. If these lumbering Canadians could feel this coming, possibly months ago, and sympathize, it may be a lot bigger than anybody thinks. A hell of a lot bigger.

T-Pain featuring Wiz Khalifa and Lily Allen—”5 O’Clock”
#62
Adding soul raps to a Lily Allen track is a brilliant idea, but this goes on too long, and except for the organ that weaves it’s way through the track like T-Pain’s conscience, doesn’t add much. It also, of course, places the emphasis of the song on Allen’s physical, rather than emotional needs, and turns her into a nagging, if sexy, bitch. I’m not saying it does total disservice to Allen’s song, but it puts the weight on the least interesting aspect. And Wiz Khalifa only makes it worse.

Glee Cast—”Somewhere”
#75

Lloyd featuring Andre 3000 & Lil Wayne—”Dedication To My Ex (Miss That)”
#81
I wish this wasn’t such an obvious take off from Cee Lo’s “Fuck You”, not just in terms of lyrical content but in sound, as well. It’s very good, and Andre 3000 is great, but the imitative quality and the shallowness of it can’t be avoided. “Fuck You” was great because Bruno Mars and Cee Lo live and breath retro soul; Lloyd is just following in their footsteps, not forging a path of his own. That may be his whole problem: as much as I’ve enjoyed his music, I still have no idea who Lloyd is.

Jason DeRulo—”Fight For You”
#83
I thought retro-sampling had hit bottom with Gym Class Heroes’ borrowings from Supertramp, but it’s impossible to underestimate the crassness of pop culture. Just when I thought DeRulo might be worth listening to, he comes up with this. I realize that sampling the African chants from “Wanna Be Starting Something” is cliche, but Toto is not an adequate replacement. Not at all. What could possibly be next and/or worse? Pablo Cruise?

Blink 182—”After Midnight”
#88
These guys have matured enough that they don’t ruin their mediocre song with meaningless histrionics, and Travis Barker is a damn good drummer. It’s still a mediocre song, though, sung by very mediocre singers.

Luke Bryan—”I Don’t Want This Night to End”
#90
I really enjoy the way the melody of this flows and changes pace as it goes along, creating a romantic atmosphere all on its own. Which is good, because the arrangement, the vocals, and the lyrics do nothing to add to the feeling.

Zac Brown Band—”Keep Me In Mind”
#99
Brown is a one-man 70′s retro movement. So far he’s focused on the laid back sound of Jimmy Buffet and the somnambulist crooning of James Taylor, but here he ups the tempo and the tension by recreating the muzak-americana of the pre-Michael McDonald Doobie Brothers. All he has to do now is tour with Fleet Foxes and take over the world by putting it to sleep.

China Anne McClain—”Calling All the Monsters”
#100
Leave it to Disney to turn Britney’s Spear’s current sound into family-safe Halloween music. They do it very well, too. This is brighter and snappier than Spear’s has been in a while, and though the voices are young, this is never corny or cheesy. It’s a good, catchy, electro-influenced dance track. Not to mention that it cuts Lady Gaga off at the pass, keeping her from releasing a seasonal record along the same lines.

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Hot 100 Roundup—8/27/11

Thursday, September 22nd, 2011

Drake—”Headlines”
#13
Is this guy capable of doing anything but feel sorry for himself? Fame didn’t turn out to be as much fun as he thought it would be; no one understands him or how hard he works; and there are all these women! Makes you wonder what he got into the business for. It sure wasn’t the music.

Jason DeRulo—”It Girl”
#39
I have mixed feelings about this record, largely because I find myself liking it more than I think I should. Most of DeRulo’s records have been terrible, but this time around he switches up his style, dumping his usual dense, sample based hip-hop for a lighter, more straight-ahead sound. Some say he’s trying to be Bruno Mars, but what I hear is a less desperate, more relaxed version of Chris Brown. In other words, a pleasant, minor talent who doesn’t carry a lot of excess baggage around with him. I doubt he’ll ever do anything great, but at least he isn’t an embarrassment.

Jay-Z & Kanye West
“Who Gon’ Stop Me”, #44
“Niggas In Paris”, #75
I have real difficulties with Watch the Throne. The music is often brilliant, but the lyrics are intentionally paradoxical, full of contradictions and ego-based hyperbole that are hard to work around or excuse. The opening line of “Who Gon Stop Me” is a perfect example: “This is something like the Holocaust/Millions of our people lost”. It’s a powerful statement, and like much of Watch the Throne, it places current events in a deeper historical context. Whether or not that context is fully justified in relation to what most of the tracks are about, however—that is, being rich and living high—is open to question. The overall stance of the album is that the suffering African-Americans have gone through is justification for those who are successful exalting themselves, living as high as they can, and bragging about it as much as possible. It’s hardly a new idea, as they well know; just the title “Niggas in Paris” alone conjures up images of black men and women who were in a position to take advantage of financial independence and the relative racial freedom of Europe and did so to excess: Joe Jackson, Josephine Baker, Sidney Bechet, James Baldwin, and many others. What gets left out of the story are the great majority who don’t have anything to brag about; not just African Americans, but Africans, whites, Latinos, Asians, and the Europeans who make their living serving people like Jay-Z and West and satisfying their needs. Like Jay-Z said in “Empire State of Mind”, “Pity half of y’all won’t make it”, with the unuttered followup, “sucker”, implied in his phrasing. It’s a drug dealer’s mentality, and even if they’re aware of it, and unsure of it, and emphasize the irony of it, it still stinks.

David Guetta featuring Sia—”Titanium”
#66
Guetta wisely lightens up his sound before the bombast takes over completely, and though this is nothing special at least it isn’t openly hostile to anyone with sensitive ears or a working brain. If he had found a singer other than Sia, whose lack of enunciation I find even more irritating here than on her own records, it might have been even better.

Miranda Lambert—”Baggage Claim”
#67
After Revolution I was afraid that Lambert was softening up, and that the woman who had made Crazy Ex-Girlfriend was gone for good. Going by this and the Pistol Annies album, though, that judgement was premature. “Baggage Claim” isn’t a great record: rhythmically it’s a little stiff, and the metaphor gets stretched almost to the breaking point, but it brings back the take-no-prisoners stance that made Lambert famous, with only the slightest lessening of intensity. She may not be as brash as she used to be, but she makes up for it with a sense of confidence that may be even more impressive. She knows what she wants, she knows how to get it, and she knows that she can. My only worry is that she’ll try so hard to make a perfect record that she’ll mistrust her best instincts and stiffen up. That’s was Revolution’s greatest weakness, and you can hear some of that on this record. Still, this sounds like a step in the right direction.

Evanescence—”What You Want”
#68
Keeping up with the times, Amy Lee and her new band mates toss a little Paramore-style melody into their mix, along with an easy to chant along with hook. I like this more than any Evanescence I’ve heard before, and for metal-edged pop (or is that pop-edged metal) this is high caliber. If the whole album sounds like this it could be another Superunknown (which should give you an idea of how much metal I listen to).

T.I. featuring B.o.B.—”We Don’t Get Down Like Y’all”
#78
The change in style—less fuzzy synths, more hard beats—is appreciated, but it’s also a step backwards towards a style he moved beyond years ago. What is new, at least to me, is the blatant homophobia. If people have a problem with Odd Future, what are they going to think of “Listen up, fag bait/them hot pants bad for your prostate.” Maybe he is just a jerk.

Luke Bryan—”Drunk On Love”
#79
Yet another song about a country girl shakin’ it for her man. In rap, women work the pole; in country, the tailgate. Bryan even steals an image from the blues: “Honey drips on the moneymaker”. Country radio programmers must know what that means, but I bet they’ll play it anyway. Pretty slow for yet another version of “Whole Lot of Shakin’”, though. I imagine Bryan intended this as a sexy grind, but since he doesn’t know sexy from a rusty pickup truck, all he gets is the grind.

The Script—”Nothing”
#89
You said it.

Mindless Behavior featuring Diggy—”Mrs. Right”
#97
There have been a lot of good teen rap groups the last couple of years, but this record is so insane, with both the vocals and the beats run through an autotune turned up to 11, that the damn thing never touches the ground. By the end of the first verse you’ve lost your bearings: just where did they expect this to end up? Good for a laugh, but that’s about it.

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Hot 100 Roundup—6/4/11

Monday, June 13th, 2011

Lady GaGa—”Hair”
#12
An odd metaphor coming from a woman who is generally seen either in wigs or with hair coiffed and dyed to within an inch of it’s life; does anyone know what GaGa’s real hair even looks like? But despite the cognitive dissonance and the unfortunate echoes of David Crosby, this is a grand piece of Springsteen-influenced disco, the kind of music that sounds great not just on the dancefloor but out on the open road. I’m particularly fond of the bridge, where GaGa’s phrasing makes her sound appropriately callow and naive. It may be the most human moment she’s ever managed.

Young Jeezy featuring Lil Wayne—”Ballin’”
#57
Jeezy’s voice holds your attention, but he works in a style that was half-dead even when he started out five years ago, and has nothing to add to it. Neither does Lil Wayne.

Glee Cast
“Pure Imagination”, #59
“Back To Black”, #82
“My Man”, #94

Nicole Scherzinger featuring 50 Cent—”Right There”
#77
Not terrible, which is a surprise considering how lazy it sounds. The music isn’t bad, but the rhyme scheme consists of repeating the same word at the end of each line, an effect almost as flattening as 50 Cents’ rap. He long ago said he had no real interest in making music anymore, and this proves it. Scherzinger sounds as anonymous as ever, and you can’t help but wonder if this would even have been released if it wasn’t for her X Factor gig.

DJ Khaled featuring Drake, Rick Ross & Lil Wayne—”I’m On One”
#78
A stylistic changeup from Khaled, which would be interesting if he was capable of making good music, but he isn’t, so we’re left with the lineup. Rick Ross is his usual monotonous self, and Lil Wayne indulges in hit-and-miss word games: good and bad puns (“I’m a made nigga, I should dust something”) with the occasional meaningful line. As for Drake, he may be serious in his doubts about the rap game, and even in his self-criticism, but he lies so consistantly about how hard his life is I find it impossible to trust him even (especially) when he sounds sincere. His hypocrisy is fascinating, though, as is his resistance to flow. Being the snobbish cad that he is, he seems to consider it beneath him.

Rihanna—”California King Bed”
#80
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 4/30/11

Jason DeRulo—”Don’t Wanna Go Home”
#92
Yet another lift from “Day-O”, this one even more obvious than Lil Wayne’s. Otherwise, this is as anonymous as most of DeRulo’s previous records. If it weren’t for that borrowed hook, it would have no melody at all.

Ashton Shepard—”Look It Up”
#95
Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 4/2/11

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Hot 100 Roundup—11/21/10

Saturday, November 27th, 2010

Glee Cast
“Teenage Dream”, #8
“Start Me Up/Living On a Prayer”, #31
“Stop! In the Name of Love/Free Your Mind”, #38
“One Love (People Get Ready)”, #41

The Black Eyed Peas—“The Time (Dirty Bit)”
#12
Since I didn’t listen to radio much in the late ’80s, the use of one of the more irritating hits of that period doesn’t bother me as much as it does some others (besides, will.i.am, with far less of a voice, still sings it better than Bill Medley did), but there’s no doubt that this record represents the group running in place, if not retreating a bit. This is nearly as good as anything on The E.N.D., but it doesn’t break any new ground (unless you consider letting Fergie play diva over minimalist dance grooves a step forward). The E.N.D., whatever you think about the music, was undoubtedly one of the more daring albums of the last few years in terms of a band remaking it’s sound and image, so it shouldn’t be a surprise if the Peas spin their wheels a bit this time out.

Kid Cudi
“Marijuana”, #54
“Scott Mescudi Vs. the World”, #92
These are good records—moody, reflective, self-absorbed but intelligent and with little evidence of self-pity. They’re only on the chart, though, because of 1) the tile; and 2) the presence of Cee-Lo Green. In other words, curiosity. Whether or not the audience is paying attention to what these songs, with their honest consideration of substance dependence, actually mean, is open to question. But Cudi deserves respect for putting the message out there.

Lupe Fiasco—“The Show Goes On”
#57
I like the sound of this, but it doesn’t really go anywhere. And I liked the sound a lot more when T.I. did it five years ago.

Jeremih featuring 50 Cent—“Down On Me”
#67
I like the music: a catchy pop mix of dancehall, dubstep, and hip-hop. But 50 Cent’s presence is a waste in more ways than one—even when he isn’t mumbling he utters nothing but cliches. Jeremih himself starts off shaky, but evens out once he gets to the hook. An interesting change of pace, but an uncertain one.

Lady Antebellum—“Hello World”
#70
When they sing about love, Lady Antebellum play it subdued and classy; they’re not great, but it’s a welcome change from the usual over-arranged country blather. Here, though, they’re delivering a message to the world, and they pull out all the stops and pump all the pedals at once. To compound their sins, their obvious inspiration is R.E.M.’s “Everybody Hurts”, both the song and the video, an exemplar of emotional intensity and restraint they warp and curdle for the purposes of their own soft-headed sentimentality before the end of the first verse. If this is how country music is going to move into the ‘90s, I prefer they stay where they are.

Jason Derulo—“What If”
#76
A power ballad written and produced by J.R. Rotem. Think about that for a minute.

Ke$ha—“Cannibal”
#77
Tastelessness can be a virtue in pop music, but only if you’re funny, or if you’re being tasteless about subjects people are (secretly) attracted to. This isn’t funny, and the cannibal demographic is, as I understand it, somewhat limited. It’s like a big budget version of a zombie movie–the effects are more expensive but somehow less impressive, and all the insane amateurism has been taken out and replaced with studio gloss, resulting in something that’s not only gross but boring.

Twista featuring Chris Brown—“Make A Movie”
#94
Fresh from his bunker, where it’s always 2003, Twista does his best to revive his video-porn fantasies, just like the good old days. Someone should take him aside and explain the difference between being retro and being in a rut.

Bubbling Under:

Sick Puppies—“Maybe”
#101
“Maybe I’m a dreamer/Maybe I’m misunderstood…” What else do you expect from a band that rose to fame via the “Free Hugs” movement? Yuck.

Train—“Marry Me”
#104
Having softened up the AC demographic with two kinda cute, uptempo ditties, Train goes in for the sentimental kill. Chances are, this will be in the AC top ten for the next year. I’ve only listened to it once and I’m already sick of it.

Don Omar & Lucenzo—“Danza Kurduro”
#105
Since I can’t understand the words (and even with a translation would probably miss subtleties that only native speakers would pick up), I’m not a good judge of this record. The music, though, sounds ordinary—the arrangement too busy, the production too harsh. Until I know better, I think I’ll stick with Pitbull.

Eric Benet—“Sometimes I Cry”
#106
This retro-soul number has it’s attributes: it’s not a bad song, and the arrangement has a nice, mid-’90s Prince feel to it. But Benet’s falsetto gets old fast, and when he strains it near the end that’s all you hear: no emotion, just strain.

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New this week—3/14/10

Wednesday, March 17th, 2010

Justin Bieber—”Never Let You Go”
#21
The most irritating thing about Justin Bieber may be something over which he has no real control: all his records sound the same. He may have talent, but he either possesses such a narrow emotional range that his handlers don’t dare let him express himself, or they have such a narrow idea of what a pop record should be that they can’t take advantage of whatever talent Bieber does possess. The first is a possibility, but I lean toward the second explanation: this is such an obvious retread of Chris Brown’s “Forever” that you wonder if anyone in Bieber’s camp has a single original idea.

Jason DeRulo—”Ridin’ Solo”
#33
Did anybody involved in this record notice how irritating DeRulo’s voice is on the chorus? Did they think it would serve as a kind of hook? Or make up for the fact that nothing else about this record is even vaguely interesting? If so, they were wrong.

Usher featuring Nicki Minaj—”Lil Freak”
#43
Somehow I don’t think Stevie Wonder ever imagined anyone using part of “Livin’ for the City” as background music for an orgy, but I guess we should give Usher a break—he’s got to get over the grief of his divorce somehow.

Avril Lavigne—”Alice”
#71
I long ago resigned myself to the use of Alice in Wonderland as a Rorschach blot for anyone low on ideas who needs a little creative boost, but that only excuses Tim Burton. This is straight cash-in and a terrible record by any standard. The only notable thing about it is that it definitively marks the moment when Lavigne gave up on doing anything new and decided to copy those who have followed in her wake—in this case, Paramore. Even another soppy ballad would be better than this.

Kenny Chesney—”Ain’t Back Yet”
#73
If you define country as music based on the nostalgia of people in their thirties to mid-forties for the pop music of their early teen years, then this is a country record. But even by those standards it isn’t a good country record, just a loud one (with horns, to boot). Gossip hounds, however, will eat up the apparent reference to Renee Zellweger in the last verse.

Godsmack—”Cryin’ Like A Bitch!!”
#74
The exclamation points in the title tell you everything you need to know about this record. Think of them as sudden bursts of guitar and you can pretend you’ve already heard the song without the painful experience of actually listening to it.

Three 6 Mafia Vs Tiesto with Sean Kingston and Flo Rida—”Feel It”
#78
If the artist lineup didn’t tip you off to how desperate these guys are for another hit, the music sure would. Most egregious moment: when Flo Rida comes on, the beat switches to an approximation of “Low”. Even worse, that’s the only part of the record that makes any sense. The rest is a confused mess.

Danny Gokey—”My Best Days Are Ahead of Me”
#78
I never saw Gokey on American Idol, but it’s easy to understand why he was voted off—the only thing thinner than his voice is his material.

La Roux—”Bulletproof”
#92
With all the Eurodisco influence on the charts it’s nice to see the real thing making some headway. Already a number one in the UK, though I doubt it will make it as far here—it’s not brash and straightforward enough for American tastes. I find it a trifle thin and stiff myself, but it’s still better than about 85% of anything else on the charts.

Chris Young—”The Man I Want to Be”
#98
As shameless as self-pitying country gets, this is essentially the male version of Carrie Underwood’s “Jesus Take the Wheel”, only worse, because you can’t help suspecting that all Young really wants is his woman back. What he should really be praying for is better material.

Steel Magnolia—”Keep On Lovin’ You”
#99
Because Lady Antebellum just isn’t enough Sugarland for the country/pop market.

Eric Church—”Hell On the Heart”
#100
Church is the kind of guy who believes old-fashioned things like simple, catchy melodies, short songs (this one clocks in at 2:45, shorter than both his previous singles, only one of which is over three minutes), and strict stereo separation. He also gets better with each record. But he isn’t that good yet. Cliches keep popping up in his lyrics, and thematically there’s nothing that separates him from a few thousand other good ol’ boys. He also has a tendency to sprinkle his interviews with references to how much better he is than everybody else. I like this record, and I hope he gets better, but I’m not holding my breath.

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New this week—12/20/09

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

Ludacris—”How Low”
#13
Since Ludacris announced his intention to make more serious records a couple of years back, things have shifted in the pop world. The recession created an audience that wanted anything other than the serious, and Ludacris wisely reverts to his old party persona. He does this, ironically enough, by sampling the most serious of all rap groups, Public Enemy, and making a record more reminiscent of Soulja Boy than anything he’s done before. The result is as silly as you might expect, but not in a particularly entertaining way, and it isn’t funny at all. Maybe that “serious” move was just a sign that he’d run out of ideas and/or jokes.

Glee Cast
“My Life Would Suck Without You”, #51
“Don’t Rain On My Parade”, #53
“You Can’t Always Get What You Want”, #71
“And I Am Telling You I’m Not Going”, #94
The songs from the final episode sum up quite nicely everything that’s wrong with Glee as music: bad karaoke (“My Life”); bad Broadway impersonations (“Parade”); bad, meaningless rock covers (apparently no one involved with this show knows what “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” is actually about—why did they even bother with the verses?); and bad, histrionic versions of overrated pseudo-soul screamfests. The world has until April to wise up, but I’m not holding my breath on that one.

Lil Wayne—”On Fire”
#62
Anyone who doubts that rap, if not dead, is at least at a turning point, should give this record a listen. It’s not just that it’s bad (though it surely is), but that it encapsulates a moment of confusion amongst even the greatest rappers about what to do next. Based on this, Lil Wayne’s rock album is gearing up to be the greatest piece of career suicide since Kelly Clarkson’s My December, except apparently nobody has the nerve to tell Wayne it’s a mistake. It’s not surprising that he’d take a downward step—after the creative burst that culminated in Tha Carter III anything he did was bound to be anticlimactic—but this is like walking off a cliff.

Jason DeRulo—”In My Head”
#63
The problem with this record is simple: after playing it half a dozen times, it hasn’t stayed in my head at all. Without Imogen Heap, he’s nothing.

Mary J. Blige—”I Am”
#67
This is nothing new, but it’s a good, solid song, and for the first time in ages Blige sounds comfortable again, wisely relaxing and not overplaying her hand or her pipes. It helps that she’s taking on a role rather than singing as herself. It may not be a masterpiece, but it’s the best single Blige has put out in years.

30 Seconds To Mars—”This Is War”
#72
Imagine if U2 and Pearl Jam got together to make a concept album about global conflict. Now imagine that the album was written not by U2 and Pearl Jam, but Queensryche. No, I wouldn’t want to hear it, either.

Snoop Dogg—”I Wanna Rock”
#80
Ah, here’s the semi-annual Snoop I’ve been waiting for, and as an extra treat it comes with a shout-out to jerkin’. Not as daring as he’s been in the past, but as masterful as ever, and that choir chanting “Snooooop dooogg” in the background makes me laugh every time I hear it.

Chris Brown featuring Plies—”What I Do”
#88
I can’t help wondering if that title wouldn’t make more sense with a question mark at the end, with lyrics reflecting Brown’s dismay at having to work with The Worst Rapper In The World® in order to boost his plummeting commercial potential. And where’s that Akon duet we were promised?

Lifehouse—”Halfway Gone”
#99
That title invites all sorts of easy quips, but the song isn’t worth even that much effort.

George Strait—”Twang”
#100
If there have to be country songs about how wonderful country songs are, I’d rather hear them from Strait than anybody else, if only because he’s made some wonderful country music himself. Trouble is, the idea of country songs about country songs is as worn-out as rock songs about rockin’ out, and nothing Strait can do is going to revive it or make anything new out of it.

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New this week

Sunday, August 23rd, 2009

Miley Cyrus—”Party In the U.S.A.”
#2
Despite its bouncy, universalist tone, the lyrics of this song reveal it to be nothing more than the usual declaration of egotistical, posturing self-importance. This isn’t a party in the U.S.A., it’s a party in one small part of the U.S.A., namely whatever part of Hollywood Miley Cyrus is currently occupying. Her only gesture to the outside world is inviting everyone else to watch her have fun. It makes sense that she namechecks Jay-Z, since this song shares an attitude with any number of self-aggrandizing rap records, including Jay-Z’s latest. I know it’s too easy to criticize Cyrus as a spoiled celebrity princess, but in this case it’s true.

Disney’s Friends for Change—”Send It On”
#20
The latest emetic power ballad for charity. I advise you to save your money for the compilation album, Now That’s What I Call Philanthropy!

Jason DeRulo—”Watcha Say”
#54
I like the chorus, which serves the double duty of being catchy and telling DeRulo where to stuff his apology for infidelity. You can tell he doesn’t mean it by the way he sings his own name at the beginning of the track. Self-love like that is never satisfied with only one admirer.

Cobra Starship—”Hot Mess”
#64
Twice as many writers and producers as “Good Girls Go Bad”, half the hooks. Since “Good Girls Go Bad” has a lot of hooks, only managing half isn’t a total disaster, though it does expose their overkill for the overcompensation it really is.

Cascada—Evacuate the Dancefloor
#80
Lack of originality can be a blessing, especially in commercial terms. Already a number one across Europe, this is essentially a Lady GaGa track without all that arty baggage and sexual ambiguity attached. It’s overloaded with hooks, too, something GaGa is rarely accused of. Trouble is, it still sounds like GaGa, garish and overwrought. Which is fine if you feel like being pummeled to deaf on the dancefloor. Me, I’ve always preferred more subtle ways of losing my hearing.

Lady Antebellum—”Need You Now”
#85
It never occurred to me until someone at another blog brought it up, but aside from the Eagles, the biggest non-country influence on modern country music is Fleetwood Mac. The rhythm track here is a dead ringer (session guys are good at that sort of thing), but the singers are no match for Christine McVie, and neither are all four of the songwriters. McVie could make seeming truisms and banalities ring with passion and intensity—all these guys can do is make you think, “Oh, that’s nice. Where have I heard this before?”

Britney Spears—”Radar”
#90
This record is more interesting for it’s release history than for itself. Originally on Blackout, for some reason it was included on the bonus version of Circus, and now, for even more intangible reasons, it’s being promoted as a single. It isn’t very good, and it goes on too long, but obviously somebody thinks it can be a hit. And right now somebody else is scouring the song for clues to Britney’s current state of mind. Not me, though, I can’t even pay attention to it all the way through.

Chris Young—”Gettin’ You Home (The Black Dress Song)”
#91
It’s been a long time since I’ve heard a good old county wedded lust song; I was starting to think that all male country singers were bachelors chasing badonkadonk. This isn’t great—the second verse, where Young sings from his wife’s point of view, doesn’t quite work—but it’s sufficiently steamy to get the point across, and old-fashioned enough to sound fresh. It ain’t Charlie Rich, but it ain’t bad.

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