Posts Tagged ‘Justin Bieber’

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Picking up the pace

Tuesday, August 24th, 2010

A few months back I wrote about how prolific Justin Bieber had been with product, releasing a record every three to four weeks over a period of six months. At the time, I wondered who might follow him down that path, and now I know: none other than Bieber’s mentor, Usher. Since January, Usher has released six singles, an LP, and, as of today, an EP, all spaced an average of four weeks apart.

In terms of actual music produced, of course, the LP and the EP are it; all the singles come from one or the other. But it’s the pace of the product that matters, especially in terms of setting an example for others. Those seeking new routes to record sales and considering something like the Bieber campaign must be watching Usher very closely, because he’s been even more successful with that strategy than Bieber, scoring two top ten records (including a number one) another couple of top twenties, and most likely a third top ten in the newly released “Hot Tottie” (although if he wasn’t sixteen and suffering so much backlash, Bieber may well have been just as successful).

A few years ago I was predicting that Usher’s days as a star were numbered, and under the old release paradigm that may have been true. But the paradigm is switching yet again, and this time Usher is on top of it. I’d look for a lot more of this in the next year, and don’t be surprised if the new standard—for pop stars, at least—becomes a new record every four to six weeks, with occasional breaks for LPs and EPs. Kanye West already seems to be thinking in these terms, even if his song a week plan doesn’t include much salable product. Exposure is the key, and exposure, more than ever before, requires a constant stream of new and different and exciting material. If you think pop music is interesting now…

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Slow Death

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010

J. BIEBZ - U SMILE 800% SLOWER by Shamantis

The super slowed-down version of Justin Bieber’s “U Smile” does, I admit, sound pretty cool (though it also sounds surprisingly random, as if someone were just pushing buttons on a sampler while either stoned or bored out of their mind). But it sets a terrible precedent. Soon the internet will be jam-packed with these things, as various kneejerk creators search for the worst possible song they can find to convert into an unrecognizable ambient “composition”. Perhaps they should go in the opposite direction, and create something more like this. Then they could get David Lynch to direct the video.

Just as a side note, I find it interesting that this should appear just as “U Smile” was starting to get a promotional push as Bieber’s next single. Is that just Shamantis’s way of promoting himself, or is something going on under the table? Are Bieber’s handlers that smart? Or is Shamantis (whoever he is) that desperate?

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Bieber cashes in

Tuesday, August 10th, 2010

In the last few weeks, instead of releasing a new record as he has every month since last August, Justin Bieber has announced a guest appearance on CSI, a 3D concert movie, an illustrated “memoir” (hey, do you remember last November? wasn’t that cool?), and now he’s appearing in a Proactiv skin cleanser infomercial. It’s tempting to think that he and his handlers are seeing signs of Bieber fever cooling off (his last single, “Somebody To Love”, which was probably his best, just squeezed into the top fifteen and has been plummeting the last few weeks), but I doubt if that’s the case. This is merely a consolidation of assets after a year of success as preparations are made for the next phase. And if the next phase doesn’t work, there’s nothing wrong with building up that trust fund while the opportunity is still there.

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The year so far

Thursday, July 22nd, 2010

According to almost everyone, 2010 has been a great year in just about every genre: alternative, country, hip-hop, techno—great records have been popping up everywhere, from both new and old artists, with a full schedule of promising releases to come.

But if that’s true, and for the most part I think it is, not much of that greatness has been showing up on the pop chart, or if it has it’s come and gone so fast it’s barely been noticed. At least four of my favorite records this year, “Super High”, “Love King”, “I’m Single”, and “Reverse Cowgirl”, disappeared from the chart after a week or two. Others, such as Jay-Z’s “On To the Next One” struggled to climb into the top 30, and then dropped quickly once they reached their peak.

Mind you, if what you’re looking for is party music, you can’t do much better than most of the records that made the top ten this year. Straight ahead rhythms uncomplicated by any sense of hesitancy or messy emotion have dominated the market, with only top drawer sellers like Rihanna and Eminem daring anything that requires much thought on the part of the audience. I like a lot of the records that have made the top ten so far this year, but I can think of only one or two that will have any long lasting effect. Party music is designed to be ephemeral, so that’s hardly a criticism, just a recognition of the way things are, and are likely to remain for some time.

Most of what I consider the best of the year so far comes from a little further down the charts, though of course that’s no guarantee of durability. Even I was surprised, though, that my number one would turn out to be the darkest record to make the charts this year, a record so full of bad feeling that it dropped off the charts after a single week and has been ignored by just about everybody. Who’d have thought I could feel alone in praising a Lil Wayne single?

As for the worst, it should be pointed out that this list does not include any of the Glee Cast singles, which are not only terrible but should never have been released in the first place. If I had included them, they would have occupied all ten places and then some. At one point, I considered making “Ice Ice Baby” both the worst and best single of the year, but that was just cynicism. I feel better now, honest.

The Best So Far (in approximate order of preference)

1. Lil Wayne – I’m Single
2. The-Dream – Love King
3. Cali Swag District – Teach Me How To Dougie
4. The Black Eyed Peas – Rock That Body
5. Rick Ross featuring Ne-Yo – Super High
6. Selena Gomez and the Scene – Naturally
7. Jay-Z featuring Swizz Beats – On To the Next One
8. Miranda Lambert – The House That Built Me
9. Jay-Z featuring Alicia Keys – Empire State of Mind
10. T-Pain – Reverse Cowgirl

The Worst (in alphabetical order)

1. Alpha Rev – New Morning
2. Artists for Haiti – We Are the World 25
3. Justin Bieber featuring Jaden Smith – Never Say Never
4. Dirty Heads featuring Rome of Subllime with Rome – Lay Me Down
5. David Guetta featuring Fergie and LMFAO – Gettin’ Over You
6. Avril Lavigne – Alice
7. Muse – Neutron Star Collision (Love Is Forever)
8. Christina Perri – Jar of Hearts
9. Mike Posner – Cooler Than Me
10. Shiny Toy Guns – Major Tom

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New this week—6/20/10

Monday, June 28th, 2010

Justin Bieber featuring Jaden Smith—”Never Say Never”
#33
I was expecting it to be bad, but I wasn’t expecting it to be this bad. The problem isn’t Bieber, who acquits himself as well as can be expected (it actually helps that he shows so little real emotion), and it isn’t the blandness of the song itself. It isn’t even Jaden Smith, who, despite his heritage, sounds talentless but willing to give it the old middle-school try. But his rap, if it can be called that, is terrible not only in delivery, but in spirit and in message. What it seems to be saying is that if you’re privileged enough to get a guest spot on a Justin Bieber record, then you don’t need to worry about all those people who are bigger and stronger and probably smarter than you are. Which is, of course, the exact opposite of the message presented in the movie. It would be meaningless to accuse the producers of a remake of The Karate Kid of selling-out their principles, but shouldn’t they at least know what they are, or were, once upon a time?

Glee Cast
“Faithfully”, #37
“Over the Rainbow”, #44
“Anyway You Want It/Lovin’ Touchin’ Squeezin’”, #58
“To Sir with Love”, #75
“Bohemian Rhapsody”, #84
“Don’t Stop Believin’” obviously wasn’t enough, so now the makers of Glee (sounds like they should be a division of Proctor & Gamble, doesn’t it?) have decided to revive the entire Journey catalog. If the show didn’t already deserve capital punishment, this would be enough to guarantee termination with extreme prejudice. At least it’s over for a few months. See you in September (and no, that’s not a song suggestion).

Shakira featuring Freshlyground—”Waka Waka (This Time for Africa)”
#43
As nice as it is to find some version of township jive on the American charts after 25 years, this isn’t a very good record. It was obviously done quickly and to order, Shakira doesn’t seem to put much into it, and let’s face it, township jive has run it’s course. Most of the backing here could have been sampled from The Indestructible Beat of Soweto, which was released in 1986. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but there are much fresher African—even just South African—sounds out there. But I have a feeling that for a long time to come, whenever most people think about African music—when they think about it at all, that is—this is the sort of thing they’ll hear in their head. That’s not Shakira’s fault, of course, or Soweto’s, or even Paul Simon’s. It’s a shame, nonetheless.

Christina Aguilera—”Bionic”
#66
Oddly enough, this is not one of the songs that Santigold co-wrote for Bionic the album. Which is just as well, since if she had she would only be repeating herself. It’s an old refrain, but once again I’m impressed by Aguilera’s daring in terms of inspiration and frustrated by her stiffness and oversinging. “So damn bionic” may well be the dumbest lyric of the year, and she sings it as if it were the most important thing she’s ever said.

Ne-Yo—”Beautiful Monster”
#67
There’s a wonderful tension to the verses, but the chorus is an anti-climax, musically and lyrically too simple and old fashioned to fit with the rest, danceable but forgettable. A lot of it sounds like an outtake from Michael Jackson’s Dangerous, and I like Ne-Yo enough that I’m willing to accept this as an MJ tribute and let it pass. Hope he does better next time.

Lil Jon featuring 3OH!3—”Hey”
#70
Lil Jon is no fool. In the four or five years he’s been unable to record due to legal complications, he’s kept a close eye on the obnoxious white guys who have been copping his style, and he’s more than willing to allow them to give him a little push as he gets back on the road. More than a push: 3OH!3 provide not only the hook but also the only real lyric this song possesses. The styles jar a bit, but even though the three of them have probably never been in the same room at the same time, it still works. It’s a softer, friendlier form of crunk, but Lil Jon doesn’t care. He’s seen the future, and he’s riding its coattails.

Train—”If It’s Love”
#90
Occasionally as clever as they think they are—”Flat like an Idol singer/Remember Winger?/I digress”—they’re also more cynical than their romantic tropes would suggest, and when the strings enter near the end you realize that they can pander with the best of them. Second single in a row to mention an eighties one-shot band (it was Mister Mister last time), which may well be another form of pandering. At least they’re willing to age with their audience.

OneRepublic—”Secrets”
#98
The stripped down intro reveals at least one secret—which is that all of Ryan Tedder’s songs seem to based on one of Bach’s solo cello concertos (which would explain their sophisticated yet comfortably familiar facade). The other is the dirty little secret that Tedder won’t admit even to himself: all his songs really do sound the same. Score one for Kelly Clarkson.

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New this week—5/23/10

Thursday, May 27th, 2010

Katy Perry featuring Snoop Dogg—”California Gurls”
#2
Unlike some, I’m offended by neither the title nor the spelling, both of which are representatives of a culture that has long since lost it’s power and has already been replaced. Problem is, this is too stodgy and tasteful to make the cut. It must be odd for Perry to realize that in less than two years her place as leading female provocateur has been usurped two or three times over. Melting popsicles isn’t going to cut it anymore. As for Snoop, his investment in ultimate cool is no longer paying dividends, and he sounds as if he knows it.

Glee Cast
“Jessie’s Girl”, #23
“One”, #60
“The Boy Is Mine”, #76
“Lady Is A Tramp”, #81
“Rose’s Turn”, #93
The closer the Glee Cast gets to contemporary music, I thought, the better they should sound. Having grown up with it, they’re bound to have a better idea of how it should be sung. And sure enough, “Jessie’s Girl” and “The Boy Is Mine” both sound like the vocalists actually know what their singing about, while “Lady Is a Tramp” is as horrible as you might imagine. “One” doesn’t work, but more because of the lame arrangement than the singing (it’s ridiculous to complain about oversinging on a U2 song; that’s what they’re for). Broadway, however, will always win out with these guys; it’s what they’re trained for, and “Rose’s Turn” is easily the best of this week’s batch. Not that that’s saying much.

Charice featuring Iyaz—”Pyramid”
#56
I could say that this is a major step up from Charice’s first single, but since “Note To God” was the worst record of last year not made by the Glee Cast, anything would be an improvement. Even generic pap like this.

Lil Wayne—”I’m Single”
#82
Since he’s currently in prison, it makes sense that Lil Wayne’s best single since “A Milli” should be layered with ever deeper levels of guilt and remorse, even if a weapons rap isn’t quite as guilt inducing as the infidelity documented here. The way Wayne twists the usual rap pornography, and even his now patented giggle, into something regretful and forlorn is beyond anything he’s done before, and I can’t think of a single record of his in which the emotions are so basic and so bare. Just like T.I., facing a year in the slammer seems to have focused Lil Wayne in ways he hadn’t anticipated. Unlike T.I., Wayne is a genius, and he goes far beyond T.I.’s bragging about how strong he’ll be when his time in jail is over. Wayne may be stronger when he gets out, as well, but he may also be someone totally different. I just hope he doesn’t get religion.

Enrique Iglesias featuring Pitbull—”I Like It”
#89
Another former superstar enlists the help of a hotter, more contemporary talent to boost his career, and ends up in support of his supposed guest. Pitbull is on a roll right now, and this has it’s moments, but just like Usher’s “OMG”, shaping a guest’s trademark sound to the star’s requirements results in something bloated and off-kilter. A vast improvement over “Do You Know? (The Ping Pong Song)”, but what wouldn’t be?

Justin Bieber—”Somebody To Love”
#98
For what it’s worth, this is Bieber’s best record. Which is only to say that it’s passable. Now he’s sixteen, Bieber’s Chris Brown imitation has a little more heft to it, but it’s still an imitation.

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Justin Bieber: Only 16, and already definitely not gay

Monday, April 12th, 2010

Justin Bieber Would Love To Cast Megan Fox For Next Video

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New this week—4/4/10

Thursday, April 8th, 2010

Sean Kingston & Justin Bieber—”Eenie Meenie”
#30
This is more Kingston than it is Bieber, and just enough of both to render it meaningless. Peeling back the garishness that has decorated Kingston’s more recent singles only reveals how lacking they are in anything resembling a hook, and mixing in Bieber’s usual pablum provides the final push toward total mediocrity. Any charm Kingston may have possessed is gone; now he’s just another dancehall-pop hack. As for Bieber, he’s never been charming. Being charming requires a personality.

T-Pain—”Reverse Cowgirl”
#75
I can understand why people write T-Pain off, but more and more I’m beginning to think he’s some kind of genius. This isn’t his most insane record (that’s still “Chopped ‘n’ Skrewed”) but it may be his funniest, and it’s at a level of musical sophistication that jokesters like 3Oh!3 and LMFAO can only dream of. All its best jokes are musical rather than lyrical (he was beaten to most of his rodeo metaphors a long time ago, anyway), and without a single swear word it’s dirty as hell. Based on the title alone, I can’t imagine it will get much radio play, but it’s bound to be a ringtone favorite. Yee-hah!

Young Money—”Roger That”
#86
The best Young Money track so far, and the second best hip-hop comedy record of the week, and that’s not a put down. Nicki Minaj does a killer Lil Wayne impersonation, while Wayne himself spends a good deal of his time giggling. The guy in the middle (do I really need to waste my time looking up his name?) is at least tolerable. The beat is insane, the raps as dirty as they want to be, and if the whole isn’t a as great as its parts, at least it doesn’t waste them.

Jaron And The Long Road To Love—”Pray For You”
#87
From the first organ note you can see the joke coming, and though keeping the music country-lovesong straight is probably intended to be satirical, in reality it drags the humor down. It doesn’t help that Jaron didn’t bother to write a third verse, either. Jokes are supposed to build, not just repeat themselves.

Luke Bryan–”Rain Is A Good Thing”
#91
Because it leads to sex, of course. Doesn’t everything in uptempo good ol’ boy country? This is better than most, though; catchy as hell, and doesn’t throw in too many cliches. I could, however, do without the self-satisfied chortle; sounds way too calculated.

Justin Bieber—That Should Be Me”
#92
This awful record makes me wonder if Bieber isn’t, in reality, Usher’s revenge on all the fickle teenage fans who have turned to younger pastures over the last couple of years. But then, those are the fans who have put this record on the chart—it isn’t being promoted as a single, it’s just an album track that the Bieberfreaks (or maybe their mothers) have decided to give extra attention. Maybe I’m just being cynical—but not half as cynical as Usher.

Martina McBride—”Wrong Baby Wrong”
#95
This isn’t bad: nice Stones inspired riff at the beginning, and I like the idea of a mother’s advice song from the mother’s point of view. It gets too tame about halfway through, though, and it goes on too long. McBride should pay more attention to Eric Church or Luke Bryan: for a song like this, three minutes is all you need. The rest is just showing off.

Miranda Lambert—”The House That Built Me”
#98
I’m always wary of this sort of country sentimentality—when country singers talk about “finding” themselves, it almost always means a return to their smalltown, family roots, a confession of their sinful, straying ways, and a nostalgia that’s sure to turn into bathos, usually accompanied by a healthy dollop of strings and some whining steel guitar. But even taking those reservations into account, this is a perfect record. There are no strings or steel guitar to be found, and Lambert’s understated vocal drives home more real emotion than any amount of Nashville oversinging. It helps that the song is the best example of its kind you’ll ever hear: the two-part chorus is stunning in its impact, and if the verse about mama and papa building their house doesn’t bring you close to tears, nothing ever will. Lambert didn’t write this, but it proves that even when she’s not falling back on alt-country standbys (Patti Griffin, John Prine, etc.), she has an unerring ear for good material. Which means she’s going to be a star for a long, long time. Boy, do we need her.

Colbie Caillat—”I Never Told You”
#99
I’ve badmouthed Caillat a lot in the past, and this isn’t a great record, but it’s made me realize who and what she really is: the twenty-something, SoCal version of Taylor Swift. She’s not as lyrically inventive as Swift, too often she falls back on cliches, and despite the title of her first hit, she’s nowhere near as bubbly—but her point of view, her romantic sensibilities, and her sense of taste and (if I can use this term) musical decorum, are almost exactly the same (there’s a reason Swift performed with Stevie Nicks, after all). The main differences are of age and geography. While Swift optimistically negotiates the fresh hell of a Nashville high school with fairy tale visions of romance, Caillat faces the ages-old Southern California disconnect of the messiness of emotional and sexual reality while living in a physical paradise. Both seem almost untouched by the real world, when the truth is that both know it all too well, and are shaping their own version of the perfect escape. Swift is the greater artist of the two, but Caillat may very well surprise us somewhere down the line.

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New this week—3/28/10

Sunday, March 28th, 2010

Justin Bieber—“U Smile”
#27
Musically, this is the most pleasant thing Bieber has done since “One Less Lonely Girl”, but it’s still bland, and also a bit creepy. Bieber’s genuflection to his fan base is about as abject as can be, and the lack of emotional edge in his voice makes him sound more like a willing robot than a real live boy. For now, his tweener fans will remain steadfast, but sooner or later they’re going to want an idol of actual flesh and blood. If Bieber’s lucky, his handlers will eventually provide material that has some. If not, by this time next year we may have forgotten all about him.

T.I.—“I’m Back”
#44
I can understand T.I.’s desire to announce his freedom as loudly as possible, but this is over busy and confused, the bragging lost in a blare of baroque synths and vocal overkill. It’s impressive in its way, but it’s too much, and it gets wearing.

Spose—“I’m Awesome”
#54
Not the next Weird Al by a long shot. The lyrics are grade school level, and the only thing I find funny is the intentionally incompetent scratching—and even that feels forced and obvious.

Usher—“More”
#76
So intent on being on top of the trends that he renders himself unrecognizable, this is where Usher jumps the commercial shark. Combine this with his stint as a mentor on American Idol next week and you have the epitome of an imploding career. Good thing he’s got Justin Bieber as a back-up.

Disney’s Friends for Change (featuring Joe Jonas and Demi Lovato)—“Make a Wave”
#84
Since this sort of “I’m going to save the world by changing myself” rhetoric is Disney’s musical stock and trade, it makes sense that this would be less self-congratulatory and insipid than “We Are the World”. Only slightly, though. I’m also willing to bet that, unlike “We Are the World”, participation was not voluntary. Because nobody’s as self-congratulatory as the mouse.

The-Dream—“Love King”
#92
Though his talent is obvious, I’ve had my doubts about The-Dream’s (self-proclaimed) genius. This goes a long way toward dispelling them. “Love King” is so full of subtle, almost subliminal twists and turns in melody, rhythm, and harmony that every time I listen some new, wonderful touch reveals itself. The neatest trick, both artistically and commercially, comes at the end, when the volume for the last minute of the song drops by nearly half. It doesn’t fade, it just drops. What better way to get radio to play a five minute track than provide DJs with a full minute designed for them to talk over?

Maxwell—“Fistful of Tears”
#96
Maxwell’s material is so subtle that if you’re in the wrong mood, or unless, as on “Pretty Wings”, he hits everything just right, he has a tendency to fade into the background. Here, the line about nearly being driven insane trying to keep his girl from going crazy gets your attention, but the rest drifts a little too far into the ether. Maxwell’s musical and emotional obsessiveness is fascinating, but I’m not sure it’s enough to make him consistently compelling.

George Strait—“Gotta Get to You”
#100
It’s impossible not to admire Strait’s craftsmanship and taste—there’s not a single false step on this record—but as he ages each record seems to be another half-step toward muzak, and this one is a full step. With music this bland his self-assurance takes on a feeling of condescension, as if the success of his seductive moves is a forgone conclusion. Maybe it is, but being so obvious about it suggests that on some level he’s just as crude as any other good ol’ boy.

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Forward into the past

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010

With all the fuss about Justin Bieber in the pop press the last few months, you’d think someone would have noticed what for me is the most interesting, and possibly the most important, aspect of Bieber’s “career”: the incredible rapidity with which he’s been releasing material. His first single came out last July, but that was just a testing of the waters. The real flood started in October. Since then, in a space of less than six months, Bieber has released seven singles, an EP, and an album. That’s an average of a record every three weeks, a pace you’d need to go back to the glory years of James Brown in the mid-sixties to match (and Brown released his records under different names). Either that or back to the 1940s, when there was no such things as LPs, and singles were the only way people could purchase music.

Albums are still a big deal, of course (Bieber’s first LP will probably debut at number one next week), but for the younger audience singles are what really matter, and the ravenous horde of Bieber fans needs to be constantly fed. No doubt this will lead to total burn out, both on Bieber’s and his fans’ part, in less than a year, but in the meantime the old record release paradigm (which was only a couple of years old, anyway) will have been blown wide open. It will be interesting to see how long Bieber waits to release his next non-LP single. I’d be very surprised if it’s more than two months. It will be even more interesting to see who follows Bieber’s path.

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