Posts Tagged ‘R. Kelly’

Bubbling Under—3/12/11

Friday, March 11th, 2011

The Band Perry—”You Lie”
#101

There are a lot of things that aren’t quite right about this band. Their music is too soft, for one; not once does it match the intelligence and sharpness of the lyrics. Though sometimes those lyrics stumble, too: it’s rare to hear a song where the first verse is so weak and the second verse so strong, but this is one and then some. “That’s not my perfume/I bet she had a curfew” is one of the most viscious lines you’ll ever hear in a country song. The middle eight is way above average, as well. All the same, something about this record doesn’t quite connect, and all I can say about them right now is that they have a lot of promise.

Travis Porter—”Bring It Back”
#104

Three teenagers rapping about the thing they love most to think about: Sex. “Run and hit that pussy like a crash dummy”, though not exactly romantic or respectful, is a great line, and they drop a few more good ones over the rest of the track. It’s the track itself that gets this over, though: sexy and silly at the same time, playing games with the sort of effects that Lex Luger, say, takes way too seriously. It also helps that they haven’t yet confused their lust with power.

Easton Corbin—”I Can’t Love You Back”
#106

And you never will if you keep singing songs as dull as this one.

R. Kelly—”Love Letter”
#107

A great chorus, and I love the disco turn it takes at the end. But it goes on too long, and though it feels less like a genre exercise than “When A Woman Loves”, it’s still too reverant toward the past to win me over.

Miguel—”Sure Thing”
#109

A good old fashioned list song, obviously inspired by The Temptation’s “The Way You Do the Things You Do”. Only thing missing is a chorus to grab you after the list has gotten your attention. The electronically lowered voice doesn’t do the trick. It isn’t melodic, and it doesn’t lead anywhere; it’s only a gimmick. Maybe Miguel should have a chat with R. Kelly.

Hot 100 Roundup—2/6/11

Tuesday, February 8th, 2011

LMFAO featuring Lauren Bennett & GoonRock—”Party Rock Anthem”
#78

I have no idea who GoonRock are or is, but I’ll assume they’re responsible for the beat, which isn’t bad—a somewhat derivative mix of Pitbull and The Black Eyed Peas with some decent hiccups and hooks of their own thrown in. I have no idea who Lauren Bennett is, either, and her vocals are so ineffectual I doubt I ever will. Not as ineffectual as the supposed leaders of this romp, however. LMFAO aren’t the worst rappers in the world, but their voices are so lacking in distinction and personality they may as well not be on the track at all.

Rise Against—”Help Is On the Way”
#89

Though it’s nice to hear music about the recent travails of New Orleans and the gulf coast, this is not the sort of music that is going to make anybody think much about it or make them angry enough to do anything. The band provides all the anger and leaves no room for anyone else’s. The speed-metal bombast is ritualistic and meaningless. They make no attempt to tell a story; the lyrics are nothing but a batch of obvious and cliched images. Worst of all, their egos get in the way. Instead of ending the song where they should, with the shouts of “It never came!”, they insist on yet another full chorus, just to demonstrate their chops and remind you of how angry they are. Help like this nobody needs.

New Hollow—”Boyfriend”
#98

Catchy, though not always in the right places, and too loud, this is what power pop—which was always as much about beauty and incisiveness as it was about speed and wit—has come to. It sounds like they decided to pack all their good ideas (most of them stolen) into a single record, and I seriously doubt if they have more. Not horrible, but shapeless and lacking any kind of charm.

Trey Songz—”Love Faces”
#100

The problem with Trey Songz is that while he’s sometimes very good, he’s never great, and often his records are serviceable and nothing more. This is fine as background music, but it lacks anything that would make you want to listen closely—the smooth gentlemanliness of Ne-Yo, the musical originality of The-Dream, the batshit craziness of R. Kelly. It’s safe music for safe sex, and though there’s nothing wrong with that, in the end it gets dull.

Hot 100 Roundup—12/26/10

Wednesday, December 29th, 2010

Lil Wayne Featuring Cory Gunz—”6 Foot 7 Foot”
#9

The background provided by Bangladesh is so stupid—and not in a good way—that it almost ruins the record for me. Wayne himself saves it. His gnomic notes to himself—you can almost see him obsessively scrawling them out in his cell—are so full of twists and turns and puns, words and phrases pulled inside out and examined to reveal newer if not always deeper meanings, that even if he isn’t saying much he seems to say it all. Writing down his raps has tightened and intensified his language, revealing more about his character than any of his free-form, off-the-cuff displays, brilliant as they were, ever did. Turns out he’s something of a grammarian, though that should have been obvious a long time ago.

Taio Cruz featuring Travie McCoy—”Higher”
#80

Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/19/10

Nicki Minaj featuring Drake—”Moment 4 Life”
#82

Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/5/10

P!nk—”Fuckin’ Perfect”
#86

“Fuck” being the word of the moment (word of the year, really), P!nk, with her usual commercial intuitiveness, tosses it into the title of a song in which the word itself doesn’t appear. I wish it did; it might liven up this otherwise bathetic self-empowerment ballad.

Jerrod Niemann—”What Do You Want”
#90

Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/12/10

Thompson Square—”Are You Gonna Kiss Me Or Not”
#92

Sugarland as Bon Jovi, just what we’ve been waiting for.

R. Kelly—”When A Woman Loves”
#93

I loved the video for this when it came out a few months ago, but I guess this is just another example of a mediocre record being lifted by it’s accompanying visuals (this is why I don’t watch Glee; I don’t want its horrible music tainted by theatrical quality). What looks loving and soulful in the video turns out to be stiff and lifeless when heard on its own. Kelly isn’t that great a singer, and his soul inflections sound calculated and more often verge toward homage, and even parody, rather than actual emotion. His “Thank you” at the end, which works in the video, sounds like a dumb, knowing wink on the record, as if the whole thing was nothing but a stylistic game.

Fabolous—”You Be Killin’ ‘Em”
#94

Though this eventually turns into one of the most sexist pop songs I’ve heard in some time (“She looks like the best money I ever spent” Fabolous says of his latest acquisition), what really sums it up for me comes in the first 30 seconds. After a brief intro establishes the electric piano riff that drives the song, Fabolous steps up to the mike, and by way of introduction, says “Niiiice”. The first thought that came into my head: “Isn’t it a little late in the day for a Vanilla Ice parody?” Second thought: “This isn’t a parody.”

The Script—”For the First Time”
#97

At first I was willing to give them points for writing about something truly meaningful: the stress economic hard times places on relationships. A lot of songs have been written about that, though (I’m sure there are a couple of hundred songwriters in Nashville working on it right now), and The Script’s tin ear for detail and sentimental musicality guarantees that this is nothing but a sop to those who feel they need a good sorrowful wallow every once in a while to get by. Every human emotion has its exploiter; self-pity, meet The Script.

Mariah Carey—”Oh Santa!”
#100

Reviewed in Bubbling Under, 12/19/10

In memorium: When A Woman Loves

Wednesday, August 25th, 2010

I’m assuming it’s no accident that this gorgeous retro-soul track from R. Kelly was leaked on the anniversary of Aaliyah’s death. Beautiful.

Download here.

Update: And now, the video (H/T Maura). It’s a retro-soul explosion.

Call the removal squad

Saturday, November 7th, 2009


Chris Brown - Graffitti

This, the cover of Chris Brown’s upcoming album, has been making the rounds all week, engendering many WTF? reactions. The meaning seems obvious enough: Brown, who looks to the future instead of the past—literally above it all—is applying some old school bug spray to the cartoonish haters, bloggers, blog commenters, twitterers, and gossip mongers like TMZ and Perez Hilton who have the audacity to stand between him and his destiny just because he beat the shit out of his girlfriend. If the bug spray doesn’t work, he’ll bash them with his guitar (probably borrowed from Lil Wayne, to go along with the clothes borrowed from Usher and the metal hand borrowed from Beyonce). Good move, Chris, you’re now officially as despicable as Akon. Oh, and you might want to ask the Konvict, along with R. Kelly and the ghost of Michael Jackson, if there might be such a thing as bad publicity after all.

New this week

Tuesday, September 8th, 2009

It feels like old home week on the Hot 100, with 11 debuts, four coming from performers who have been around for well over a decade, and two of them getting ready to enter their third. The best debuts, appropriately enough, come from one of the oldest acts, Weezer, and the newest, Wale. Wale tries to tip the balance by lifting a 40 year-old hook that’s appeared twice on the Hot 100 this year already, but I give the prize to Weezer—their stolen hooks are even older, and a lot better to dance to.

Pearl Jam—”The Fixer”
#56

I imagine this rocks out pretty hard live, but whether it’s the song itself or the production, the record comes across as well-crafted but laid back in a way I don’t think they intended. They don’t sound like a fixer determined to save the world so much as Mr. Fixit, or an affable plumber in Mr. Rogers’s Neighborhood, come to repair a leaky faucet and share a good story or two. The latter may actually be more effective in the long run, but somehow I don’t think that’s what they meant.

Love and Theft—”Runaway”
#65

Keep running guys, we can still hear you.

Creed—”Overcome”
#73

The teenage sense of entitlement that seems to fill this record would make sense if these guys were still teenagers, but they’re not. They’re Christians in their mid-thirties looking to keep their name alive in the culture, and their entitlement has more to do with a rock star’s, and an evangelical’s, sense of superiority than anything else. What’s worse, they don’t use the word “overcome” in the civil rights or personal travail sense of overcoming obstacles and injustice, they use it in the sense of the Book of Revelations. It’s the devil and his minions they’re overcoming, which is to say that they’re looking to wipe out anybody who doesn’t believe the same things they do—hence the apocalyptic overkill of their music. When they’re not indulging their sadistic religious revenge fantasies, though, I’m sure they’re just wonderful guys.

Lady Gaga—”Paparazzi”
#74

To go with the repulsive images in the video—dead women dressed up and posed like the figures in Helmut Newton’s photographs—GaGa swipes the melody line from Berlin’s “Take My Breath Away” to provide herself with a hook and add that final mid-eighties touch. I understand the appeal of true decadence, but this is just dumb dressing up as smart and calling itself elegant. She should just join Duran Duran and get it over with.

Weezer—”(If You’re Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To”
#82

At first, the hook line seems nothing but a piece of sophomoric cleverness, but that’s the point: it’s a pick-up line that slowly turns into a pledge of lifelong commitment, from first summer fling to marriage to the moment you find yourself trying to stare down a future that promises nothing but decline. By the end of the song they barely have anything to say to each other, but they both still want to, and that’s all that matters. Say what you want about Weezer—and just about everything has been said—but it takes real brains to pull off a song like this without sounding either overly sentimental or flippant. The music, with its echoes of “You Can’t Hurry Love” and “Walking On Sunshine”, provides the perfect background: patience and fortitude sparked with moments of spontaneous joy. You’d be hard pressed to find a better example of a riff deployed as metaphor.

Three Six Mafia featuring Kalenna—”Shake My”
#85

Three Six Mafia: the Halle Berry of rap.

Pleasure P—”Under”
#87

Still number 2, and if his next record is as dull as this, he won’t rank even that high. At least when he was in Pretty Ricky he had crassness going for him.

Selena Gomez & The Scene—Falling Down
#93

Disney’s methods are so hit and miss that you never know where a good record is going to come from. Nothing that Selena Gomez has been involved with so far has been worthy of notice, but suddenly here’s a perfect pop confection, and with it comes the realization that she’s been as much a victim of her material as everyone else on the channel. No music factory is perfect, of course, but give me a couple of more records like this and I could put together a Disney compilation that could stand with just about any pop album of the last decade. It would be absolutely meaningless, but it would be entertaining as hell.

R. Kelly featuring Keri Hilson—”Number One”
#96

The title may be a pleasing fantasy or fond remembrance, but even with Hilson doing her best Beyonce imitation I don’t see any way this makes it onto pop radio. I suppose there could be something to admire in the daring of putting out a record about how great you are in bed after being barely acquitted of pissing on a 14-year-old girl, but it’s more likely a symptom of sheer cluelessness and ego than anything else. The music isn’t bad, but Kelly has become a sideshow, and he (and maybe Hilson) seems to be the only one who hasn’t realized it.

Wale featuring Lady GaGa—”Chillin’”
#99

Despite the recycling of Steam’s hoary old hit (apparently hearing it at every athletic event in the world over the last forty years just isn’t enough for some people), and the presence of the dreaded GaGa, I find myself liking this record a lot. More than any of the thousand freestyles over “Paper Planes”, this is where M.I.A.’s influence jumps hip-hop. It’s simplified for sure, but that only emphasizes the catchiest parts, which is what good pop is supposed to do. GaGa does a pretty good impersonation, and there are moments when she seems to be channeling some piece of classic post-punk, The Slits maybe, or even The Raincoats. That might be going too far, but that’s what I hear, and this is still a lot better than I expected it would be.

Skillet—”Awake and Alive”
#100

Since I hold them responsible for the existence of bands like this, maybe Pearl Jam could add these guys to their fixit list. Or at least convince the vocalist to stop dropping his cast iron namesake on his toes every ten seconds.